From the shadows of the Banana Bunker, I, Supreme Comrade Jim Kong Un, swung forth on vines of revolution to confront the eight-limbed capitalist menace known as Gerbleton the Octopus. With my mighty hammer-fists and the power of proletarian bananas, I pounded his squishy tentacles into submission. As the ocean trembled beneath my glorious strength, I hoisted Gerbleton from his watery lair and mounted his glistening, ink-stained form atop the People’s Palace as a warning: no cephalopod shall challenge the Kongmunist Empire!

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If you are a beautiful strong black woman, someone will put this in your comments.
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