Alright, picture this: you're a superhero—let’s call you Super Mom—with three amazing sidekicks (your kids) who are ready to take on the world. Your current lair, while cozy, is starting to feel a bit cramped. You’ve got dreams of a three-bedroom fortress with a two-car garage where you can finally park your trusty steed (or, you know, your minivan).

Now, here’s the plot twist: your credit score is sitting at a charming 205. I mean, that’s practically a secret superhero identity at this point! It's like your credit is wearing a cape made of bad decisions and has an “Invisibility Cloak of Financial Woes.” But fear not! Every superhero has to face a few villains before they save the day.

So, let’s embark on this epic quest to find your dream home! We’ll need to tackle a few challenges along the way—like negotiating with the bank, which might feel like trying to convince a dragon to share its treasure. But with your charm, wit, and maybe a few snacks (because who doesn’t love snacks?), you can win them over.

Imagine the kids running wild in the backyard while you sip coffee in your new kitchen, trying to remember what peace and quiet feels like. And that two-car garage? It’ll be your sanctuary where you can pretend to have it all together while your kids blast music in the background.

So, are you ready to suit up, gather your trusty sidekicks, and dive into the adventure of home-buying? Together, we’ll turn that 205 credit score into a glorious success story. After all, every superhero deserves a place to call home!

Let’s do this! 🦸‍♀️🏡🚗

Hello Timothy, funny seeing you on here and not in the gym for once. Did I mention I can now bench 5500 kilograms, yea almost as much as you’re mom. Like how heavy she is, because you know, she's fat. Anyways, it’s good to see you distracting yourself by playing these games. Admit it, your just scared Timothy, your just a scared little boy who can’t bench 135lbs or squat 185lbs or deadlift 275lbs (I bet your going to look back on this as a metric to see how much BACKWARD PROGRESS YOU’VE MADE). Distract yourself with these silly little games Timothy, because while you game I’ll be lifting 300, 400, 500 (maybe even 501 KILOS!)(per arm)(That’s not even close to your mom tho).

Anyways, I’ve started taking SARMS recently with my JMBs and I’ve seen exponential growth in my BFMs. Contrary to popular belief it actually makes your p3nis larger.(THE SARMS BTW) I’ve seen an increase from negative three and a half to two and a half CENTIMETERS, YEA I KNOW IT’S IMPRESSIVE (It’s along the negative x-axis, left to right, so it’s an increase). ANYTHING IMPRESSES A SIMPLETON LIKE YOU TIMOTHY. And to answer the question I know you’ve had, no, I’m not having anymore sex than usual because of my massive gains and increase in penis size. However more women are looking at me and I anticipate to lose my virginity any day now, God I’m so lonely please I just want to be valued as a human.

HOW am I getting these gains you ask?? IT’S SIMPLE REALLY! I drink 17 protein shakes a day. MY SH1T IS LIQUID! I take at least a container of creatine a day as well. MY MUSCLES ARE JUICED. AND TO TOP IT OFF, I SNORT GFUEL AND PREWORKOUT LACED WITH COCAINE. MY GOD, IS IT THE BEST F3CK1NG HIGH THERE EVER WAS! I LITERALLY LEVITATE! (LIKE THAT SONG BY DUA LIPA AND DA BABY!) (EVEN AFTER I’M DONE WORKING OUT I STILL HAVE SHAKES) Now you probably want to know my gym routine. WELL, you should know it, you see my all the time, but anyways here it is. I wake up bright and early at 1:45am. (early bird gets the first free-weight) I then perform a full body workout from 2am (after driving to the gym and drinking/snorting all of my preworkout goods) until 11:45pm (YES IT TAKES THAT LONG). I then pound all 17 protein shakes and the other half of my creatine container from 11:45pm to 12:45am as I’m driving back home.