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I am the owner of the gay stripclub, "Hot Bananas", and we've realized that you hadn't been here last night. It came as a shock for me knowing that because its the first "Long black bananas night" you miss, and we all know you love Long black bananas night.
Have you changed us? Are the men in the club not hot enough? We can find new for you. You are our most frecuent client and we wouldn't like to loose you.
-Vladimir Putin