Candice? Oh I know Candice. We first met on the island of Sugandhi. You know, just off the island Garglononn. She works at the Wendys just off the highway E 10. She enjoys Fitness, as well as Tapes and CD's. Specifically those of the band Imagine Dragons. She is in rehab right now, came down with an awful case of Ligma from smoking too much Mind Goblin. But none of that is important. What is important, is that she is finally getting Updog.

I get a massive erection every time I consume a Nestlé product. Something about their unethical business practices just gets me rock hard. The thought of farmers not getting paid a fair wage, babies being killed by formula, and child labor, all give me a throbbing erection.

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You probably have quite a few opinions about what is going on in the news circle right now. But it's important to remember one thing. You're wrong, here's why. To start, you're completely missing the point and everything you think is actually in odds with reality when you look at the data. In fact, you're not close to be accurate. It’s simple to understand when you stop for a second and actually look at issues, once you open your eyes, you will see that you're wrong on every one of them.

WRONG! WRONG! WRONG! WRONG!

But what about the other thing I heard? No! If the past is any indication of the future, not only is there no chance that you will ever be right, but all signs also suggest that you never will come close once in your lifetime. The only way for you to be right is to repeat everything I say, word for word to every person you know. Until then, you're wrong.

So it's like baseball but with added complexity and tactics. Deciding who bowls next, and in what order everyone gets a chance to bowl, is a huge consideration and can completely change the way the game is going.
Then when you add onto it "test" matches, which are 5 days long, it becomes less a tactical battle and more a tactical war, because you have to try and double bluff you opponents with the types of bowlers you use and the types of balls they bowl with the knowledge of what you've done in the days before. Though even in one day matches, it can become an hours long tactical battle between one batsman who is good enough to stay in for that long, and the bowlers and fielders trying to get him out.

Hello team, I'd like to preface this message through making you guys aware of the fact that I am a high IQ player. Some of the things I'll do this game may seem irrational at the time - but I can assure you, every action that I take has a greater meaning, and unless you also have high IQ you'll probably not understand the "questionable" things I do this game. In conclusion, do not speak to me like we are equals and there will be no problems, thank you.