AT AGE 4 SUCCESS IS NOT PEEING IN YOUR PANTS.
AT AGE 12 SUCCESS IS HAVING FRIENDS.
AT AGE 16 SUCCESS IS HAVING A DRIVER'S LICENSE.
AT AGE 20 SUCCESS IS HAVING SEX.
AT AGE 35 SUCCESS IS HAVING MONEY.
AT AGE 50 SUCCESS IS HAVING MONEY.
AT AGE 60 SUCCESS IS HAVING SEX.
AT AGE 70 SUCCESS IS HAVING A DRIVER'S LICENSE.
AT AGE 75 SUCCESS IS HAVING FRIENDS.
AT AGE 80 SUCCESS IS NOT PEEING IN YOUR PANTS.

Don't be salty, just get your success first.