"They brought in a woman who was at least six or seven hundred pounds; she was sitting on a pallet, she had a sixty pound bag of manure, and she was licking an oversized lollipop. They brought her in on the forklift - on a forklift - laid her down and they said, you know 'Have at it.' Me being a professional, I turned to them and said 'No problem; I need my sunglasses, a blunt, and half a Viagra.' And I ♥♥♥♥♥♥ every fold she had".

Girls are as plentiful as stars in the night sky… and just as unreachable for you.

AN: stop flaming ok! I dntn red all da boox! dis is frum da movie ok so itz nut my folt if dumbeldor swers! besuizds I SED HE HAD A HEDACHE! and da reson snap dosent lik harry now is coz hes christian and vampire is a satanist! MCR ROX!

Fun Fact: Did you know that Ohio is the only US state that doesnt have any letters from the word "Mackerel" in its name?


#RIPRAFAEL