Big, shredded, natural. Pick 2

I was in my college classroom earlier today with my 5% jug, Love IT kill IT hat on, and my 5% whatever it takes shirt, with my shorts that go past my knees, and my adidas hightops on. I was just finishing off my 15th meal, and then I pulled out a mirror from my backpack, and admired myself with a nice right arm bicep flex. The girls were loving me and my 5% lifestyle. They were giving me all these complements like "Freak" "Meathead" and "Juiceman".
The professor then stops me mid bicep flex and says "Sir please put your mirror away and stop being a tool bag, and I think I see your nipple." I was completely outraged! I laced up my swagger adidas shoes made with real fur really tight, got up, and did my 5% penguin walk over to the professor. My large oil filled arms began pulsating. I knew as a 5%er I had to show this egghead what I was about. As the professor's eyes filled with fear, I immediately reached into my backpack and pulled out a couple 45 plates I always carry around in case I have to do a couple hundred calf raises while standing around. I then threw the 45s point blank into the professors face. Then as my finisher, I flexed my oil filled biceps and covered the weak professors in my hot steamy oil. Let me tell you, the girls went crazy. I then pulled my pants down to show all the ladies that the rumors were true.... my ♥♥♥♥ does hang lower than my balls. Long story short, they just couldn't resist my 5%er meat rocket.