Recent reviews by Moronic Minds

It's a wonderful game.

Don't go in expecting a city builder - or a godhood game like B&W, because this is very much not it. This is much more akin to a puzzler game like Islanders or Dorfromantik. My only complaint is that I wish there was more of it. Best puzzle-game this year.

"Esports Godfather". It might sound dumb - but trust me when I say -
This little game goes crazy.

Many indie titles have tried to do what this does - but this is the first time I'm impressed and having a great time.
Did you grow up playing a lot of League of Legends / DOTA but don't have the time or energy to put into it anymore? Do you also like little strategy games? Are you a fan of autobattlers?
This one has all of those elements into one - and a lot of love as well.

Is the game somewhat poorly translated at times? Yes - a bit. Do I grow a little bit tired at the AI Anime Portraits where every single person looks like an anime protagonist with ripped jeans and perfect hair? A bit. Did I heavily enjoy the possibility of adding my own portraits to use instead? You bet.
Is the game worth 14.99$?

Yes. Absolutely. I have ploughed 12 hours into it - and I've absolutely already got out my money's worth.
If you've ever wasted any dollars on any of the other "esport tycoon titles" - this one is the king - or godfather.

This is an absolute gem.

Think of it like Hades but with Noita or Risk of Rain levels of breaking the game with your builds.

This is an absolute gem and incredibly impressive work, insane for being one dev.

Made with love, and should be treated as such. Here's a beginner tip, start off on commoner difficulty.

Cutest game this year with a super-innovative statscreen. Love the emotion-system!

This is a cool relaxing puzzler. It has some kinks, but overall I had 6 very fun hours. I love the presentation, all of the designs are very cool, the puzzles are nice and there's a ton of different ways you can end up. The New Game + system was really cool, and I will probably play again.

My biggest gripe (except an autosave issue that I encountered, and the most tyrannical parent-to-child relationship ever) is that it seems extremly hard to find someone to become partners with. During my six hours I tried my luck with three meaningful relations with my first boy-character, and got friendzoned every time. During my second playthrough with a girl character, the guy admit his feelings for me - but turned out to have extreme social issues with sexuality and anything even remotely close to romantic feelings. I don't know how the current system works, but it really does seem like if you don't pick 90% of the (correct) romantic options whenever you get them, you are doomed to end up with a "randomized ending partner after highschool".

It's a real shame, because at the end of the game you are really attached to your character, and it leaves a little bit of a bitter taste. I would have loved my next character to have my earlier romantic relationship as the father/mother, but instead I get the genes of a random npc that shows up for the last five seconds of the ending.

This review is however written during the first day of release, and maybe the game will be adjusted in the future. All in all, I had great fun for six hours for a very low price, and I would recommend this game to anyone that feels like it's right up their alley. Presentation-wise, it really is amazing.

---{Graphics}---
☐ You forget what reality is
☐ Beautiful
☐ Good
☐ Decent
☑ Bad
☐ Don‘t look too long at it
☐ MS-DOS

---{Gameplay}---
☑ Very good
☐ Good
☐ It‘s just gameplay
☐ Mehh
☐ Watch paint dry instead
☐ Just don't

---{Audio}---
☐ Eargasm
☐ Very good
☐ Good
☑ Not too bad
☐ Bad
☐ I'm now deaf

---{Audience}---
☐ Kids
☐ Teens
☑ Adults
☐ All

---{PC Requirements}---
☑ Check if you can run paint
☐ Potato
☐ Decent
☐ Fast
☐ Rich boi
☐ Ask NASA if they have a spare computer

---{Difficulity}---
☐ Just press 'W'
☐ Easy
☐ Significant brain usage
☐ Easy to learn / Hard to master
☑ Difficult
☐ Dark Souls

---{Grind}---
☑ Nothing to grind
☐ Only if u care about leaderboards/ranks
☐ Isnt necessary to progress
☐ Average grind level
☐ Too much grind
☐ You‘ll need a second live for grinding

---{Story}---
☑ No Story
☐ Some lore
☐ Average
☐ Good
☐ Lovely
☐ It‘ll replace your life

---{Game Time}---
☐ Long enough for a cup of coffee
☐ Short
☐ Average
☑ Long
☐ To infinity and beyond

---{Price}---
☐ It’s free!
☑ Worth the price
☐ If u have some spare money left
☐ Not recommended
☐ You could also just burn your money

---{Bugs}---
☐ Never heard of
☑ Minor bugs
☐ Can get annoying
☐ ARK: Survival Evolved
☐ The game itself is a big terrarium for bugs

Minimalistic, stylish, fantastic tycoon game, probably the best in the genre. If you liked Game Dev Tycoon enough to start try downloading mods to make it a harder game, this is the fantastic pick for you. This game is incredibly satisfying, rewarding and can keep you occupied every so often. This is a game to return to over and over and fall in love with all over again, if this is your genre. That being said, if this is your first tycoon game, maybe begin with an easier one.

---{Graphics}---
☐ You forget what reality is
☐ Beautiful
☑ Good
☐ Decent
☐ Bad
☐ Don‘t look too long at it
☐ MS-DOS

---{Gameplay}---
☑ Very good
☐ Good
☐ It‘s just gameplay
☐ Mehh
☐ Watch paint dry instead
☐ Just don't

---{Audio}---
☐ Eargasm
☑ Very good
☐ Good
☐ Not too bad
☐ Bad
☐ I'm now deaf

---{Audience}---
☐ Kids
☑ Teens
☑ Adults
☐ All

---{PC Requirements}---
☐ Check if you can run paint
☑ Potato
☐ Decent
☐ Fast
☐ Rich boi
☐ Ask NASA if they have a spare computer

---{Difficulity}---
☐ Just press 'W'
☐ Easy
☑ Significant brain usage
☐ Easy to learn / Hard to master
☐ Difficult
☐ Dark Souls

---{Grind}---
☐ Nothing to grind
☐ Only if u care about leaderboards/ranks
☑ Isnt necessary to progress
☐ Average grind level
☐ Too much grind
☐ You‘ll need a second live for grinding

---{Story}---
☐ No Story
☑ Some lore
☐ Average
☐ Good
☐ Lovely
☐ It‘ll replace your life

---{Game Time}---
☐ Long enough for a cup of coffee
☐ Short
☐ Average
☑ Long
☐ To infinity and beyond

---{Price}---
☐ It’s free!
☑ Worth the price
☐ If u have some spare money left
☐ Not recommended
☐ You could also just burn your money

---{Bugs}---
☑ Never heard of
☐ Minor bugs
☐ Can get annoying
☐ ARK: Survival Evolved
☐ The game itself is a big terrarium for bugs

While wearing it's Slay the Spire influences on it's sleeve, Monster train is a triumph and an absolute gem to the genre. I can't get enough of it, every run feels different. Studio "Shiny Shoe" has done an amazing job, and I applaud them.

This is one of the greatest games ever to play with your friends. If you manage to gather four willing friends to join you (or even more for better times), disable your discord in favor of the group-chat, this game is one of the biggest blasts to play. I have never been so flabbergasted by the utter betrayals and horrific actions by my closest friends as when playing this game, nor have I gotten to betray them in part in so juicy devilish ways.

There is nothing better than sticking together as a group of four people, thinking you've singled out the loner struggling around alone as the traitor and then suddenly getting the message "Three Survivors Left" on your screen, turning your trusting brotherhood into a splintered shocked shell of a former group where accusations are suddenly thrown left right and center.

For the ultimate experience, be sure to pick up the extra objectives causing even innocents to place some cheeky bear traps and destroying helpful signs.

This is the police is an excellent title.

Over and over again it adds new fresh features into action, and it doesn't get stale.

This is a strategy / adventure / management / police simulation, and it does it better than I would have ever imagined.

The strategy and simulation part of this game is utterly brilliant, but it's not even the best part.

The adventure and story part of this game is absolutely fantastic. The voiceacting blows most other titles out of the water and you feel absolutely invested in the story of the main character. There are several chapters in this game, and they keep getting better and better.

My only gripe with the game is that it doesn't utilize it's most exciting features enough! There is a part of the game where you hunt a serial killer, and it's absolutely great. Long story short, the hunt isn't that long, which is a shame because it was a huge strong part of the story.

This small issue doesn't take away from the overall experience though. The price tag of 14.99 $ is riddicolous and if you feel at all interested you shouldn't let this one go.

9.5 / 10 - Absolutely Awesome