Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Dear Mr. Morosan, this is Sister Agatha from the preschool down the road. Did you and Rania have a child recently? I ask because of all the crying and whining I've heard coming from your house. The only explanation is that there is an immature person in there, and surely that wouldn't be you, a fine emotionally-stable adult! Please come by and I'll give the child a free lesson in manners! Cheers, Agatha.

ah.

This isn't cringe, I agree with this and I'm a dude. I personally identify as a nerd. I dress quirkily but have style and color coordination, I can socialize without being totally awkward, I have friends, we are a clique and not "friends out of desperation". I like to party, and am decent looking, I work out, and I have sex regularly.. But yes, I wear glasses, and I do like to read quite a bit. I reddit, I play PS4 plenty, I write poetry and attend poetry readings. I'll do cosplay occasionally and will be perfectly fine playing chess on a Friday night now and then. I embrace all of this. I'm a total NERD, and in my own nerdy way, I like to think I'm sort of cool.

I noticed that you used “😭” in your comment. Just wanted to say, don’t give up anything in your life. I don’t know what you’re going through but I’m always here to help.

What the ♥♥♥♥ did you just ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ say about me, you little zombie? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the STARS, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Umbrella, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in biological warfare and I’m the top boulder-puncher in the entire BSAA. You are nothing to me but just another zed. I will wipe you the ♥♥♥♥ out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before in Raccoon City, mark my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ shotgun shells. You think you can get away with trying to bite me all over the world? Think again, ♥♥♥♥♥♥. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of agents from STARS and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the magnum, maggot. The magnum that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your itchy tasty.