Recent reviews by #1 slovakia hater

Gregg Wallace's favoruite game to play when hiding from his autistic child

10/10

prior most played game on my profile took 7/8 years to reach 710 hours.


took me 3 months to reach 810 hours. I don't want to know my Gamepass playtime since release. (+FM22)


this game ruined my life.

10/10

draw line press go.

unironically not a hard game. eu4 much better.

Pros:
•Can squat with комраде Boris & Sergey
•Hard bass dancing tutorial
•Drinking with polski kurwa
Cons:
•No palinka

10/10 must buy this game is a piece of art forget Battlefield 1 or Infinite Warfare. This game cannot be described in a non Slav language. Best 39p I have spent.

its ♥♥♥♥ tbh

can 360 noscope zombies with Nick Cage torch

10/10 would wank over zombie ass again.

Can't really say much, but what I can say it's a bit ♥♥♥♥ really...

Made me remortgage my entire house so I could have a pretty knife to kill my entire family with.

10/10 would be homeless again.
Also:
If you enjoy squeaky Russian kids (if you are into that sort of thing you sexual deviant) make sure to rush B with Tec-9 only. Listening to 'cyka bylat' made me into a full-time lover of Putin, also made me have repeat vietnam flashbacks.

For your recommended experience i recommend you buy fibre-optic internet and have the following PC specs:
CPU - Intel Xeon v2699
RAM - 128gb
GPU - x4 Titan X

Should play at about 60fps. Enjoy your CSGO Experience.

It's a GOOD GAME. BUT.

The microtransactions for Commanders, Intel, Faceplates, Skins, Emblems and Victory Strikes. They ruin the game. In-game store? I'll take Ardennes Assault and the British Forces as an overpriced DLC, for something that should be in the base game anyway, I'd let it slide if it wasn't for the amount of microtransactions. Up to £3 for one commander (which cannot be bought with the new points system) and £5 for a skin pack that includes just 6 skins for vehicles only. It's a psuedo-pay-to-win game. With the skins, it could be handled so much better, I.E CSGO. The use of the steam market and trading make the aspect enjoyable, this, is not. You throw you're hard earned cash for what? Nothing. Again with CS:GO you can trade in the hopes of getting your money back. This you can't.

Before the recent drops update, you had to level up to get new items (Commanders, Intel, et cetera), this was alright, in the sense that the items weren't even that bad. The new system changed that. The 'points' system rewards you with a "random" drop (again, Commanders and so forth) after collecting a score of 6000 by playing games. I quoted "random" as everytime I have recieved a drop it has always contained points. 500 to be exact. To get a random £5 skin pack, I'd need 22500 points. To get 22500 points I'd have to get 45 drops. To get the 6000 score to get 1 drop, I need to play either 3-4 games, as playing a game (to the end) rewards 1500 and winning an additional 500. An average game lasts around 30-40 minutes. So, just to get ONE £5 I'd have to play 180 games. If each game averaged at 35 minutes, thats 6,300 minutes. 105 hours. 4.375 days straight. FOUR DAYS. It's stupid as the average wage in the UK is £72 per day. THATS £288 YOU COULD SPEND ON FOOD AND HAVE LEFT FOR CoH INSTEAD OF PLAYING THIS FOR 4 ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥.ING DAYS.

Rant over.

Being a massive fan of CoH since around 2008, I fanboy-ed/hyped the hell out of this game before it came out. The gameplay is fun, placing mines over a frozen rivers to trap vehicles and taking out an entire column of enemy tanks with a single, well placed airstrike. It's fun. People seem to dislike ColdTech, I like it, blizzards hold your infantry down with need of constructing fires to keep them warm but compromisng being stealth, or getting them to shelter without giving away your position. Compared to CoH 1, things like machine guns and flamethrowers work differently and are somewhat more realistic (Blitzkrieg Mod in CoH 1 changed this).
To conclude this review, if you're looking at purchasing the game, buy CoH 1 first and install the Eastern Front, Blitzkrieg and Europe at War mods, they're amazing and are more fun than this game, apart from mulitplayer can be empty at some points.

Don't buy and of the skins or microtransation ♥♥♥♥♥, only we can stop it buy not purchasing it.

Pros:
- Good Campaign
- Easy to use UI
- Competitive
- Very good modding community

Cons:
- Multiplayer can be laggy.
- Can be fps demanding on low end systems (i.e Laptops)
- The amount of in-game items and DLC is fraudulent. Why pay to add armies that are already in the game and can be used through CheatMod.
- BASICALLY THE ENTIRE MICROTRANSACTION SYSTEM. IT NEEDS TO DIE.

I've always loved the Total War and CoH franchises. This game is no different. Considering how bad my laptop is when it comes to games (around 15-20fps average on map and around 10-15fps on large battles), I've never had an issue with this game (apart from when you mod it till it crashes). Beautitful graphics, large-ish campaign map and for once, compentant AI.
I'm not one for buying DLC, but for christ sake, get Fall of the Samurai, it is the best Total War to come out and the best gunpowder-era Total War even if it is only DLC. I could talk about this game for days, it's one of the most fun games I have played in a long, long time. Avatar campaign also adds to the multiplayer battle aspect of the game too, unlike previous

Pros:
- Good Graphics.
- Amazing Workshop mods and modding community.
- Fun
- Decent AI
- Well Balanced.

Cons:
- Only 2 Player hotseat Multiplayer (single player is fun but can get tedious)
- Amount of DLC (I got RoTS for free anyway)
- Siege Battle are generic copy pastes and are very boring, unlike previous games with large siege engines and arty. But this is a historical game and Medieval Japan did not have large walls.
- Some mods make aren't compatible and/or make the game crash (not entirely CA's fault)
- The fact you don't have it in your library