Recent reviews by Alex

Blisters and Bedrock!

I, like many, hold very fond memories of playing Budokai Tenkaichi 3 back in 2007.
At the time (and alongside Smash Bros. Melee), it was my favorite fighting game to play; after all, my brother introduced and taught me, be it the game or anime itself.

Now, in 2024, Sparking! ZERO somehow manages to reawaken those very same feelings of joy I had back then.
Better yet, the sense of nostalgia in this is phenomenal as well, except the gameplay has improved in every regard.

Thank you, Spike, you once again knocked it out of the park with this one.
Thank you, my dear brother, for the opportunity to come full circle and kick your ass now, just like you did back then.

Last but also most importantly: Rest in peace, Akira Toriyama. Thank you, especially, for shaping part of our childhood and many more.

There was
a REVIEW
           here.
It's gone now

I love boobs. Do you love boobs?
The Breast Cancer Research Foundation (a 501(c)(3) charity loves boobs too!

Personally, I'm all for donating to a foundation that clearly loves boobs.
And hey, if you (love boobs and) have the means to donate to such a foundation as well, then I honestly think you should.

100% of the proceeds go to the charity and Blizzard won't be seeing a cent, so don't worry, you're exclusively supporting boobs here.

If you'd like to know more about BCRF, then visit www.bcrf.org and see how your contribution can (and will) help boobs.

Sincerely,
someone who loves boobs

As someone who had already purchased Pink Mercy during the original charity campaign back in 2018, I'd still like to use this opportunity to urge anyone to buy and/or re-purchase this, granted they have the financial means to do so.

Considering 100% of the proceeds go to the Breast Cancer Research Foundation (a 501(c)(3) charity and Blizzard doesn't see a single cent, that alone makes it the single best DLC you could ever buy for this game.

Seriously, while Mercy might just be the last character I'd pick, I still love boobs as much as the next guy.

If you'd like to know more about BCRF, then visit www.bcrf.org and see how your donation will help a great cause.

Schizophrenia Kickstarter™

If I had to describe Animal Well, then it’s pretty much like Halo 2 meets Halo 3 in a perfect combination to make the world's first well-type game.

Others even called this, believe it or not, "The Knack Killer".

And if that (somehow) wasn't good enough for you, you also get a free loaf of wonder bread upon purchase.

Modern elements, in combination with the very retro artstyle give the game a very unique vibe, nothing short of stunning. The attention to detail is also outright amazing and I cannot praise it enough.
It just oozes with charm and is oddly "nostalgic".
Mysterious, yet calming music, almost therapeutic and ambience really helps to sell the package as a whole and tops it all of, making sure you get to immerse yourself fully.
Play this in a dark room, if possible, it's almost cathartic. I highly recommend it.

To be completely honest, I might have only spent [1 hour] in the well so far but I can easily see this become my favorite platformer Halo game of all time.




Platforming feels good and responsive, with a good variation of easier and harder jumps, the puzzles will be quite interesting (I can already tell, just looking at some rooms) and the map itself - while outright beautiful - will hold many, many secrets to discover.
I know that I barely scratched the surface here. Quite astonishing what 34 megabytes can hold.

Also, it has capybaras, so that's a big plus!

I'll keep my review updated throughout my playthrough.

Wishlist it and then buy it. Make dunkey proud! In that order.

You won't regret it.

The game gives you a 3 minute window. However long the song lasts.
Anything happens in that 3 minutes and you're him. No matter what.
Anything happens a minute either side of that and you're on your own.
Do you understand?

Well, if you don't, then ask yourself this:


As long as the answer to either of these questions, the more the merrier, is yes or you just openly identify as Ryan Gosling (he's literally you, after all), then it's safe to say this game is for you.

However, please note that this game is a visual novel/racing game, not just a roadtrip simulator.
There's about a 50/50 split when it comes to the actual gameplay and choosing a route/moving along the map; it's not a map you can just open up while driving, it's a separate element.

The trailer definitely does a poor job at pointing this out, so if you think regular pauses between driving sections (the latter of which usually last a whole song, i.e. 3:30 min.), are too immersion-breaking for you, then that is definitely something to consider.

Still, I honestly think that including the map the way they did, having to manage aspects like your speed, because it directly affects gas and how much it will cost you, the events you come across, including cop cars you have to react to and stop for (or not!) and all the little scenes when you meet all different kinds of characters, do a lot more good than harm to the story.
The latter are voice-narrated, which adds to the game's feel quite a bit, usually prompting you to make a decision as well:


While your "fear" keeps creeping up on you, you'll also need to manage things like your "focus" by resting in cities, which might lose you a bit of time, sure, but it'll also make sure that you're fit for the long road ahead.
Alternatively, you can take some... uhm... "substances", that's the word!
They'll do the trick too. More or less.

Last but definitely not least, you obviously have to manage your car's condition as well, which can be damaged by crashing (duh..) in the aforementioned driving sections. That's not gonna happen to you though, remember? You are him!

YOU CAN'T EVEN WATCH THOSE WRIST ROCKETS

On a more serious note, do not - and I repeat - do not purchase this under any circumstance.

There is literally zero reason to play this, since you can just grab the original for like $5 and mod that instead.
There is no reason to even pirate this.

All they managed to do here was break two complete - yes, two already finished games, somehow break them to the point they seem unfinished, increase their size by an unreasonable amount and sell them to you for more.

If anyone deserved Order 66, then it's Aspyr.

you can kill yourself

10/10