Unmanned's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 29 Oct, 2016 @ 11:47am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 30 Apr, 2018 @ 12:32pm

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 29 Apr, 2018 @ 6:54pm

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked 1 May, 2018 @ 1:38pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 30 Apr, 2018 @ 10:25pm

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 29 Oct, 2016 @ 11:47am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 29 Oct, 2016 @ 11:47am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 1 May, 2018 @ 10:52am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 1 May, 2018 @ 2:17pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 1 May, 2018 @ 3:11pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 4 May, 2018 @ 11:37am

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 4 May, 2018 @ 1:27pm

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

Unlocked 14 May, 2018 @ 9:52pm

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 1 May, 2018 @ 2:34pm

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked 16 Oct, 2019 @ 8:07pm

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 16 Oct, 2019 @ 9:06pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 16 Oct, 2019 @ 8:21pm

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 22 Oct, 2019 @ 10:50am

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 5 May, 2018 @ 1:08pm

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 29 Oct, 2016 @ 11:47am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 4 May, 2018 @ 1:02pm

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 16 Oct, 2019 @ 9:12pm

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 1 May, 2018 @ 2:25pm

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 14 May, 2018 @ 9:53pm

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Unlocked 18 Mar @ 4:04pm

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 29 Apr, 2018 @ 7:01pm

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 10 May, 2018 @ 12:05pm

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 1 May, 2018 @ 2:17pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 10 May, 2018 @ 12:06pm

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 22 Oct, 2019 @ 11:05am

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 29 Oct, 2016 @ 11:47am

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 29 Oct, 2016 @ 11:47am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 29 Apr, 2018 @ 6:55pm

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 29 Oct, 2016 @ 11:47am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 12 May, 2018 @ 10:32pm

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 8 Mar @ 5:27pm

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 9 Mar @ 9:26am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked 22 Oct, 2019 @ 11:01am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 4 May, 2018 @ 1:28pm

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked 6 May, 2018 @ 11:49am

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked 6 May, 2018 @ 1:58pm

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Unlocked 6 May, 2018 @ 9:29pm

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Unlocked 8 May, 2018 @ 11:06pm

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

Unlocked 14 May, 2018 @ 10:19pm

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.

Unlocked 6 May, 2018 @ 8:55pm

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

Unlocked 14 May, 2018 @ 10:07pm

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 9 Mar @ 4:44pm

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

18 / 30

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

1 / 30

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

11 / 30

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

0 / 10

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

1 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 20

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

12 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

1,515 / 5,000