very nice profile!!!!♥

 
Magic with Miranda "Origins"
 
Miranda, I've received numerous complaints about you from many of my students. Need I remind you that the "Temple of TjarleN" is a sacred place where magic is to be learned and perfected
Who, me? No
Explain why you attempted to transform Sam into a cat, but failed! He's now running around telling everyone his name is J'zargo!
Ok, so in Skyrim there's a guy...
Or why we have a guy named Patches in the hospital after you manipulated his mind into thinking he could trust fall off a cliff, and into the arms of his imaginary friends
That's insane! I'd never...wait, that worked?!
Or why Carla's complaining about rulers appearing under the bathroom door each morning?
Oh, I just wanted to see how long she was going to be..
MIRANDA!
 

 
Magic with Miranda #4
 
As they approached the blacksmith's cottage, they noticed a hole in the wall. To their surprise, a little sister appeared and climb down as she ventured off in search of ADAM
 
Wait a minute Noble! That's the story to BIOSHOCK!
 
Oof, sorry
 
They saw Handover out back banging and clanging on a piece of metal from the wing of an X-Wing Starfighter.
 
STAR WARS? We're now in STAR WARS?!
 
Dammit, so sorry!
 
Miranda heard a sound coming from her pocket
Miranda, your Eyephone's ringing
You mean the wooden box that has a glass window on it and has no electronics inside because these are the medieval times?
Yeah
NO!
Can I answer it?
Grr, I'll answer it...Hello?!
 
Niko, its your cousin Roman! Do you want to go Bowling?
 
Wrong number...Wait a sec...NOBLE!
 

ju nub xaxaaaxa ju vak ban hahahah

 
Magic with Miranda #3
 
I can't believe I won my first battle! This is so cool!
I wouldn't celebrate too soon, look up ahead.
A hunter from town must have heard you battling that thug and came to investigate.
Since he's no threat to us, we should sneak past him if we can.
How?
Summon an animal that makes a lot of noise, such as a bird or a goat. That should keep him distracted for a while.
But I never read the tutorial on how to summon. I always just closed those windows every time they popped up.
Miranda, this isn't a game. Focus your mind on the animal you wish to summon and it will appear. You must concentrate

Trust me, you can do this.
 
Ok, here it goes....SUMMON!
 
https://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1694152881
 

 
Magic with Miranda #2
 
Pardon me, are you the one they call Miranda?
Who are you & how do you know me?
A guild has placed a price on your head and I plan to collect it
Miranda, we should leave RIGHT NOW!
 
Are you on drugs?
Drugs? No! I'm just here to kill you
Yeah, that definatly sounds like drugs
I'M NOT ON DRUGS! I will now show you my true form..
 
TRANSFORM!
Now you DIE!
 
Haha, you idiot...We're on land and you transformed into a fish!
Dam, she's right. Well this sucks
 
VICTORY +10 XP
 
I won! I beat the thug on drugs!
 
CHOOSE ONE REWARD:
 
A reward! I choose
 
(1) HALF LIFE 3
 
(2) 40 TF2 GOLDEN FRYING PANS
 
(3) 40 CS:GO KNIVES
 
(4) A Sports Water Bottle   THIS ONE!
 

 
"You Made It Worse!" Results
 
Trampoline:
 
I bet many of you thought the cow would go straight through the trampoline, right? Nope
 

On the bright side, he's no longer in a tree
 
 
TNT: A lot of you thought this was a good idea. That's quite troubling
Excellent! The tree's gone!
 
And so is the cow
And your house
And the girl nextdoor's house HEY!
And your hearing
 
 
The cute girl:
 
(Knock knock)
Yes?
.....
Can I help you?
....... (Stop being so shy and say something)
Do you need something?
.......... (Hurry up and say something!)
I'm going back inside now, goodbye. (Door closes)
............. Mooooooo! Splat
 

  
After going through the results of the last battle, 70% of you lost.
After seeing that, I thought "Where's the fun in that?". That being said, I've decided to end the Noble's Knights game and begin something a little more fun. Its called:
 
"You Made It Worse!"
 
Here's how to play:
 
Each week, I will give you a problem along with 3 ways to solve it. Choose the one you feel will make the situation end "less" worse. The fun part is that every option will make things worse, but by how much is up to you. Comment me your choice. At the end of the week, I will reveal what each choice did. Let's begin!
 
See this cow?
 
Well he's stuck in a tree
 


 
Now I'm not going to blame this on you, but...I'm pretty sure YOU did this!
Use one of these to get him down
 
Trampoline
TNT
The cute girl next door
 

 
Magic with Miranda #1
 
Toto, I don't recognize anything around us. What year is this?
Two-towns-end
2000?
No, the year is 2 and we've just reached the town's end
WHAT!? Ok, stay calm Miranda. Toto, do you know what a cell phone is?
Yeah, Lady Lynn sells phones
No, I said "cellphone"
Yeah, Lady Lynn sells phones
Ok, this is good I guess. What kind of phones does she sell?
Apple phones
Really? She sells iPhones!?
Yeah but they're just a wooden block with a window. You look through the window and blink at someone standing in front of you. They then count your blinks and match it up with a letter in the alphabet and write it down. Eyephones are pretty dumb
Oh no, dam.
We'll reach the dam shorty. It's just up ahead
 

 
Greetings fellow Knights!
 
There's still 2 days left to send me your 2 attacks. Current scores for this week's battle are now posted. If you don't see your name on the leader board, then it means the Poisonous Pigeon has survived your attacks. Now I know what some of you might be wondering, "How on Earth did I lose to a pigeon?". Since I've never lost to a pigeon before, I can't answer that. My best guess is that maybe he was once a Prison Pigeon that got really strong lifting weights and defending his portion of the courtyard. Now that I think about it, why didn't he just fly away from the prison? He's a freaking bird! Even if he became a wanted fugitive, I doubt anyone would go after him. Sure, there are Chicken Chasers, but who chases Pigeons? I'll have to Google that.
 
Regardless, you can rest easy knowing that Pigeons only have a 6 year lifespan so you'll get your revenge by the year 2025
 

 
NOBLE'S ⚔️ KNIGHTS
 
Instructions on how to play are on my profile
 
Noble has chosen you to fight as one of his knights.
Should you accept his quest, you will find yourself fighting:
 
The Poisonous Pigeon (It's your first quest, so lets start small)
 
It's health is: 30 (Should be pretty easy to defeat)
 
Post a comment on my profile with the 2 numbers you have chosen.
This battle will end on Saturday.
 
May You Be Victorious ⚔️
 

 
Prologue:
 
Miranda was just an average girl living in New York City.
One winter morning, Miranda woke up from a dream to the sound of a knock at her door...
 
Miranda, open up! It's me, Toto
Go away, I'm sleeping. I have work in 4 hours...wait, what's a Toto?
Miranda, be serious. We must hurry. Grab Peaches and lets ride
Peaches? HEY! Wheres my Mustang! It was parked here last night
Miranda, Your Mustang is standing right in front of you
 
That's a horse!
 
My Mustang is white and has 500 Horsepower
 
Well Peaches is also white and she's a very strong 1 horsepower
Grrr! Have you seen any of the white mustangs that are made of "metal"?
Blacksmith "Handover" may have seen your metal mustang, he's always working with metal. Lets pay him a visit when we get into town...
 

 
Noble's Notes 
 
To my Miranda fans out there
 
Beginning next Monday, the Magic with Miranda series will be rebooted and become a weekly series.
New stories will be released each Monday (Miranda Mondays) and will be numbered so that future fans can follow along.
The stories will still feature Miranda and Wendy, but will now follow an actual story line.
 
 
To my Space Fact fans out there
 
Beginning next Friday, Space facts will be released each and every Friday (Fact Fridays)
They will still be random and funny, just as they are now.
 
 
As always, if you wish to no longer get the stories or the facts, please feel free to let me know.
I know it might not be everyone's cup of tea, and that's ok.
 
Until then, feel free to stop by the profile and say hi.
Take care everyone
 

 
Chlorine Trifluoride: The "Fun" Fuel
 
Back in the day, rocket scientists attempted to use Chlorine Trifluoride as a rocket fuel.
Back in the day, rocket scientists quickly stopped trying to use Chlorine Trifluoride as a rocket fuel.
Wondering why?
 
Lets play a game:

"What does Chlorine Trifluoride set fire to"
 
Glass
Brick
Sand
Asbestos
Metals
Rocket scientists
Ashes
Almost everything
 
Water makes it explode, and since we're made mostly of water 
Afterwards, it will create an acidic cloud of Hydrochloric & Hydrofloric acid Yay!
 
Once, one-ton of it was spilled in an industrial accident. It burned through 30 cm of concrete and 3 more meters of gravel beneath it.
 
Here's how they say they handled it:
 
      
  

+rep hacks

-rep normie ♥♥♥♥

-rep třepe se mi ruka při spreji

-rep sere 30 minut

-rep salty

-rep troll

-rep ♥♥♥

 
I've received some questions regarding my new profile design.
Let me take a moment to answer a few of them:
 
Q: Are your rockets safe?
A: Rockets are basically bombs with people attached, so the answer is yes!
 
Q: How fast can they go?
A: To get into Earth's orbit, our rockets must travel at 17,600 Mph (28,000 km/h). That's faster than most Italian sports cars.
 
Q: How long does a trip take?
A: Trips to the moon usually take 3 days. Traveling to Pluto at 35,000Mph (56,300 km/h) takes 9.5 years. We encourage all Pluto travelers to pack a light lunch and a snack.
 
Q: Can I get a refund if I'm not satisfied with my flight?
A: Certainly. Simply bring your receipt to our customer service center located on Pluto within 30 days.
 
Q: HEY! Wait a minute! If it takes 9.5 years to get to Pluto, how would I even get there within 30 days to get my refund?!
A: Yes.
 
Q: Yes?! That's not even an answer!
 

 
Gather around ladies and gents! Its time for Noble's:
 
"Super Awesome Fun Time Game Playing Enjoyable Experience Wow Thats Cool"
(or "SAFTGPEEWTC" for short)
 
You might be asking "Hey Noble, what the heck is SAFTGPEEWTC"
 
How would I know? I'm just now hearing about this for the first time as well. I'm guessing its a game or an activity of some sort. The name doesn't seem to offer much info and the acronym is just way too long. Its the kind of name Miranda would choose. Who knows?
 
For today's SAFTGPEEWTC, the rules are simple. Stare at the dot in the center of the image for 15 seconds, then look away from your screen and look at any object that's nearby.
 
https://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1637464381
 

 
Magic with Miranda 
 
Hey Wendy, do you want to play a game?
Sure. What's the game?
Its called "I'll hide and you attempt to locate me somewhere nearby, meanwhile I stay hidden because I found a really good hiding spot" game.
You mean "Hide and Seek"?
Yeah, thats what I just said. Why are you copying me?
That is NOT what you just said, you said....oh never mind, lets just play the game.
Do you want me to go over the rules first?
I'm pretty sure I know how to play hide and seek, so i'll skip the tutorial
You sure?
Of course I'm sure Miranda, its freakin Hide and Seek! Its the easiest game on the planet!
Ok, but don't say I didn't warn you....
 
https://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1634250834
 

 
Magic with Miranda 
 
Hi guys!
Where have you been?! It's been almost 3 weeks!
I've been busy helping a small village recover from a forest fire.
Your recklessness with fire spells better not have been the cause of that fire
Seriously Wendy? Do you really think I'd do something that dumb?
YES!
I just used "Splash" to extinguish some of the fires
"Some" of the fires?! What about the "rest" of the fires
Don't worry, I'm still putting them out right now
Oh. So since you're here with me then HOW ARE THE OTHER FIRES BEING PUT OUT!
I copied the spell to my clipboard and paste it 1000 times before I left.
 
Work smarter, not harder! That's my motto
 
https://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1628617184
 

+rep pro naší kočičku Salajka

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Happy new year :D nya! <3

-rep Retarded troll +weeb i hope u ♥♥♥ asap

+rep

 
Put down that Nintendo Dreamcast controller and gather around because its story time!
 
"The Tale of Noble the Knight"
 
Long ago, a knight named Noble served as the princess's guard. The princess never noticed him but he noticed her. In an attempt to gain her attention, Noble decided to enter the upcoming festival's talent show. Knowing that he lacked any sort of talent, he enlisted the help of a world renowned dance choreographer with no legs named Leon. Noble studied legless Leon's sweet dance moves but never quite understood them because he had trouble watching what Leon's legs were doing. After weeks of training and learning absolutely nothing, the day of the festival had finally arrived. A frustrated and hopeless Noble had no other choice but to perform in front of the princess with no real talent. Here is how it went:
 
https://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1584150425
 

 
Magic with Miranda 

Hey Noire, can you perform magic as well?
I can transform into a goddess but I'd rather just punch my problems in the face
Here we go again. Yes Noire, we all know you have anger issues
Watch it Wendy or you'll be next
Oh, i'm so scared hahaha...uh oh!
 

 
What the fu...
 
Oh my god! You finally broke the curse....and my nose!
Wendyl? You're back?!
I'm back and i'm outta here. I'm not dealing with your recklessness any longer
HEY! You can't just abandon me like that!
Yeah, that's just mean!
Oh yeah? Watch me
Wendyl...before you leave, can I ask you something?
What?
 
 
 
Look, Wendy's back!
 
NOOOO!!!

 
Magic with Miranda
 
Hey, are you the idiot that's been going around throwing meteors at fire ant nests?!
Woah! Calm down. Who are you anyway?
My name is "you're getting punched in the throat"
Wow, you're kind of.. whats the word again? right, CRAZY!!
That's Noire. Don't mind her, she's always mad. Hi, my name is...umm, wait..what was it again?
I've had HORRIBLE memory issues ever since I gave physics the middle finger and survived a fall from a kingdom that floats in the sky
This might sound a bit crazy but do either of you know of any shops that sell magic lamps?
There's one over in Magic Lamp Town. We can take you there if you'd like?
Really? Thank you!
And when we get there, I'll find someone to punch in the throat
Lets go!
That's Noire. Hi, my name is...umm, wait..what was it again?
 

 
Magic with Miranda
 
JACKPOT! I finally found a fire ant nest!
...said nobody ever
Let's reach in there and take all of their sweet sweet honey!
I'm pretty sure fire ants don't make honey
You're so wrong
Oh really? Show me then
Its so easy. I just reach in and ouch ouCH OUCH! Wendy, they bit me! Grrrrr!
Of course they bit you, THEY'RE FIRE ANTS!
I'm not even mad about that. I'm mad that there's no more honey left because they ate it all.
That's why you're mad? Because they ate it all? THEY DON'T MAKE HONEY!
They must pay for their greed!
Wait, What?!
 
BATTLE TIME: YOU CHOOSE MIRANDA'S SPELL
 
Dragon's Breath- https://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1565867354
 
Boom Bringer- https://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1565864871
 

 
Magic with Miranda: Fabled Friend Vanilla
 
Wendy look! Its a tiny little knight. Can we pet it?
You're asking if we can pet a knight? NO!!
Whatevs, I'm petting it.
Hello tiny knight, I'm Miranda. Aww, you're so soft!
Hi Miranda. My name is "remove your hand from my head", but you can call me "Vanilla of Valhalla"
You're tiny little sword is so cute! Can I hold it?
No
Please
Miranda, that's a Valhalla knight's sword
So?
That sword is enchanted with powerful magic that triggers once the sword has left it's owners hand
Haha, yeah right!
HEY! Give that back!
I'm not scared of some tiny...uh oh!
 
https://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1564491897
 
https://steamproxy.net/id/Minaduki_Catgirls
 

 
Magic with Miranda
 
Have you ever seen a Giraaafe?
You mean a "Giraffe"?
No, a Giraaafe
Why do you keep calling it that? It's not "Giraaafe", its "Giraffe"
I'm not talking about Giraffes, I'm talking about Giraaafes. There's a difference.
NO MIRANDA, NO! There is NO difference because there is NO Giraaafe!
So what do you call a racing giraffe?
A WHAT?!
You know, a Giraffe that runs in races. What do you call that?
A fast running giraffe, thats what I call it
Well you're wrong
Miranda, you're wasting my time. Why would I care about a "Giraaafe"?!
Because we now own one
WHAT!!??
Relax Wendy, I made sure I bought the fastest one. See for yourself
 
https://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1560964480
 

 
Magic with Miranda: The "Fabled Friends" Series
 
So you've decided to join Miranda and Wendy on one of their many adventures, what's next?
 
Each week, 2 friends will be chosen at random. One for the current week's story, the other for the following week's story. This ensures that if you're chosen but unavailable, we can push your story back another week while someone else has their story told.
 
You'll receive a comment from me letting you know that your adventure is about to begin. Simply send me a message and we'll begin discussing the name & class of your character.
 
To keep things fair in terms of cost, I'll present you with a selection of potential emotes that I've found on the marketplace. The one you chose will be the one I purchase. Once your story is told, that emote will be yours to keep. Consider it a gift.
 
Let the "Fabled Friends" series begin!   AND YOU
 

 
Noble's Notes

Hello Ladies and Gents, it's your good buddy Noble. As always, I can't begin a Noble's Note without first thanking all of you for the support you've shown me so far. This series would've never been possible if we had never met. I may be the story teller, but each and every one of you are my story's world.

Going forward, I wish to pay back your kindness by picking random friends from my comment section to appear as characters in future stories. If you're picked, your Steam name will be used in a story along with an emote that illustrates your character. If this interests you, let me know in my comments.

See you soon

P.S. My profile is slowly becoming 100% Yuri themed. If you love yuri as much as me, stop on by and say hi. I love meeting other yuri fans. If you're a fan, check out my yuri art below:

https://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1556740981
 

 
Magic with Miranda (Story Artwork Link Below)
 
MIRANDA! What were you thinking?! How do you make one of the easiest spells turn into
the largest lightshow mankind has ever seen?!
Well, I dropped the staff and then BOOM-BAM-KABOOOOOM!
I can't believe those bandits didn't see us thanks to your stupidity.
They did see us Wendy!
Then where did they go?!
They were the KABOOOOOOM part of my explanation.
I don't have time for this foolishness, lets head this way and....OH MY GOD!
 
MIRANDA, LOOK!
 
 
https://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1548762073
 

 
Magic with Miranda (Story Artwork Link Below)
 
Miranda, over there!...BANDITS!
What do we do?!
Since I can't run as fast as you, I'll hide here and you hide further up the road.
Ok, then what?
Once they pass you, cast a flare spell so I can find you, then we'll escape together.
But I've never cast one of those before
Just aim your staff at the sky and say "flare" and a small light will shoot out.  
They'll never see it because its silent and not very bright.
Oh, well that sounds pretty easy
that's because it IS easy, dummy. Now go!
 
15 minutes later......
 
https://steamproxy.net/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1547260834
 

 
Magic with Miranda
 
Put those...umm "things" away and empty your pockets NOW!
You first, Mr. Pocket Thief
MIRANDA! I'm so sorry sir
You dare question a knight of the King's Guard!
If you've got nothing to hide, show us your pockets
I'd never steal someone's...pockets, why do I have these?!

(Pickpocket Failed: Level -82)

Good question, thief
Her stupid reverse pickpocket actually worked!
Forgive me m'ladies. I shall return these to its owner
Leave, you shiny pocket thief
Miranda, that was AMAZING!
Thanks Wendy!
Miranda, I want you to know...I'm so proud of you
Aww Wendy, i'm so happy right now. I feel as happy as that guard will be
once he finds that big bag of coins in his other pocket
 
WHAT!!!
 

 
Magic with Miranda
 
HALT! There's been a report that a local shop owner had his pockets stolen.
Now, I know that may sound ridiculous...
Dammit Miranda, I told you so..
....but pockets really are the best way to expand your inventory when you don't own Havel's Ring.
wait, WHAT?! Not you too!?
 
Please show me what's in your pockets
Miranda, this isn't good
Its ok, I got this..
No, no you don't got this
What if my buddy Wendy over here shows you her boobs?
Huh?!
Well, I guess that would be enough for me to "forget" that I saw you two today.
I can't believe i'm doing this....Here!
 
WOAH!, Not cool!  Why do you have 3 boobs, and why are they green?
 
WHAT?

 
Oh wow, that is weird
 
MIRANDA!!!

 

 
Noble's Notes
 
Hello everyone. I Just wanted to take a minute to talk about the Miranda series.
First, It makes me so happy to see that so many of you are enjoying the series. Reading your comments after each story brings me an incredible amount of happiness and I am truly thankful for that.
 
Second, the new Miranda group is now open. If you're enjoying the series, consider joining. The group is still a work in progress but once complete, will feature stats for each character that appears in the series as well as a back catalog of older Mirandas that newcomers may have missed.
 
Lastly, despite the popularity of the Miranda series, I respect that it might not be everyone's cup of tea. So if you would like to no longer receive Miranda's stories, feel free to send me a message letting me know. Your happiness will always be my top priority.
 
That's all for now. See you on Friday!
 

 
Magic with Miranda
 
Lets pickpocket each other! Maybe we can find more coins
That's got to be the stupidest idea I've ever heard
Oh come on
Nope...hey, get your hands out of my
Look, 3 coins!
What the?! Check my other pocket
2 more!
Why is this even working?! I'll check yours
 
Empty. I'll check the other pock...Miranda, whats this
A large bag of coins
WHAT?!
They're the shop owner's. I used my Speech skill to ask for his money and it worked. Then I asked for his pockets, but it failed, so I took them and ran
 
Wait, so even though he gave you money, you still took his pockets? What the heck Miranda?!
 
I got them so we could carry more items in our inventory. Without Havel's Ring, this is the next best thing. Every bit helps!
 

 
Magic with Miranda
 
I'm so sorry
Transform me back, NOW!
What if we pickpocket the store owner & get our money back?
Then we'll buy another magic lamp from him and..
Absolutely not! Your Pickpocket level is -78
You always end up placing our items into their pockets. NO!
C'mon Wendy, have some faith. I can do this
Sigh, don't get caught
 
HEY, Get back here!
       
 
Damnit
 
I got them!
 
That was close, but I did it!
You did? NICE! We can't go back there,
but at least we have our money back. Now we can..
 
wait, what the heck are these!?
 
They're his pockets.
HIS POCKETS?! Why did you..they're EMPTY!
I may have dropped the money
WHERE?
Into his other pockets
 
(Pickpocket Failed: Level -80)
 

☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️
☁️☁️💗💗☁️💗💗☁️☁️
☁️💗💗💗💗💗💗💗☁️
☁️💗💗💗💗💗💗💗☁️
☁️💗💗💗💗💗💗💗☁⁣️
☁️☁️💗💗💗💗💗☁️☁️
☁️☁️☁️💗💗💗☁️☁️☁️
☁️☁️☁️☁️💗☁️☁️☁️☁️
☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️
Have a nice weekend <3

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Have a nice Friday, the weekend is closing in!

Signed by Lamss, have a nice day!
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ +rep great person
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀+rep not a scammer
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀+rep nice player
Signed by Lamss, have a nice day!

 
Magic with Miranda
 
VICTORY!
x7
 
We got copper currency coins!
You mean money?
Thats what I said
Thats not what you said. You said...nevermind
Lets spend it


Welcome!
 
These prices are high
Watch this
 
(Persuasion) Drop the price of this magic staff
 
That costs 9 copper currency coins, but you can have it for 9
NICE
Thats not a discount! Also, its called MONEY
What do you have for 7
A used Magic Lamp with one wish left
OK
But thats a desk lamp!
So?!
I wish Noble named you "Moron-duh"
Oh yeah?! I wish Noble named you "Wendy"   
 
NOO!
Oops
 

🌹

 
Magic with Miranda (Battle Encounter)
 
Miranda, now's your chance to gain some battle experience.
Use your magic to block his attacks.
 
Got it!
 
He's using a water attack! 
 
              
MAGIC
UMBRELLA!
 
Seriously Miranda?! He's now using fire attack! 
 
                 
MAGIC
EXTINGUISHER!
 
Damnit Miranda! Be serious!  
Fine....fine...Hold my staff Wendull.
Huh?! But you need this to defea....
 
                  
BRICK!

Wendil, the brick did the trick!
Why on Earth do I even bother.