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Also, WHY do you always smell so good? What is that, some kind of pheromone warfare? I don’t know what cologne you’re wearing, but I swear it’s specifically designed to distract me and make me question my priorities.
And the way you say my name? Nope. Illegal. You have this infuriatingly casual way of making it sound like some kind of compliment, even when you’re just yelling it across the room to tell me I forgot my keys again.
Honestly, it’s exhausting being around you. You’re too much. Too kind, too funny, too… ugh, never mind. Forget I said anything. You’re lucky I tolerate you at all.
First of all, the way you smile. Like, how dare you? You just walk around grinning like a beacon of joy and charm, leaving me to sit here like some underpaid extra in the movie of your life. Tone it down, okay? Some of us are trying to focus.
And don’t even get me started on how you always casually roll up your sleeves, revealing your forearms like you’re in a cologne ad. What are you trying to do, ruin me? Have you no shame?
║▒\
║▒▒\
║░▒║
║░▒║ put this
║♥ ║ on your friends
║░▒║ profile
║♥ ║ to protect them
║░▒║ against ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
║♥ ║ and jews
║░▒║
▓▓▓
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If you are a beautiful strong black woman, someone will put this in your comments.
╚═══════════════════ ೋღ☃ღೋ ════════════════════╝