The Bad Gentleman put some powder in his knickers
And shuffled through security.
Once in his seat, The Bad Gentleman watched a film.
It was the one about Edith Piaf (not a bad film),
But he couldn’t really get into it because it had subtitles
And because he kept thinking about the fact that he had to blow his ♥♥♥♥ up.
Then he speculated how angry the gaffer would be if he came home
Without an exploded plane-load of westerners.
In the end he made a half-hearted attempt to make the plane go bang,
But he screamed when his knob caught fire and the brave
Westerners jumped on him and twisted his arms behind his back
And extinguished his privates.
Well, when he landed everyone treated him like ♥♥♥♥ and
It was excruciating when he did a piss.
He felt like a right plum.
- Tim Key