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“Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Jesus Christ and accept that you too can become straight through daily prayer, self-flagellation, and eating Chik-Fil-A every day!”
At this moment, a brave, trans-Asian, self-diagnosed pansexual demiromantic vegan multisouled person who had been free of all animal products and only bought products at the local transgender co-op boldly stood up, holding a glass filled with some white liquid.
-“Hey, Professor, what is this?”
The arrogant professor smirked like a rapist and smugly replied “It’s clearly milk, you crazy ♥♥♥♥♥♥. What the ♥♥♥♥ does milk have to do with political science?”
-“Wrong. It’s an all natural vegan soy almond kombucha latte. No animals or transpeople were harmed or raped in the making of this product.”
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