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85 of 85 (100%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

Spring Fresh

Clean any map adequately
Unlocked 27 Aug, 2017 @ 2:19pm

Employee of the Month

Get the Employee of the Month reward for your office
Unlocked 27 Aug, 2017 @ 2:19pm

You're Fired!

Get fired!
Unlocked 27 Aug, 2017 @ 5:34pm

Blood Soaked

Spill 100 dirty buckets
Unlocked 31 Aug @ 7:25am

Blaze of Glory

Incinerate 2000 items
Unlocked 19 Mar, 2022 @ 6:36pm

Bloody Hell!

Mop up 10,000 splats
Unlocked 18 Mar, 2022 @ 5:13pm

Who's for Dinner?

Get eaten
Unlocked 28 Aug @ 10:01pm

Top Brass

Pick up 800 casings
Unlocked 26 Mar, 2022 @ 4:37pm

Taking Out the Trash

Pick up 1000 pieces of trash
Unlocked 26 Mar, 2022 @ 8:17am

Ubermensch

Speedrun a map with at least %25 par time to spare
Unlocked 29 Aug @ 10:45pm

Pedestrian

Track over 20,000 footprints
Unlocked 22 Mar, 2022 @ 3:02am

Janicide

Blow up a fellow worker with the help of an ominously bright-red explosive charge
Unlocked 2 Sep @ 12:19pm

Need a Hand?

Receive a total of 35 helping hands from the Slosh-O-Matic
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 6:16pm

Bins? Limbs!

Suffer the wrath of the Bin machine 75 times
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 6:18pm

First Aid

Restock a total of 50 medkits over your cleaning career by punching out of levels with medkits
Unlocked 29 Aug @ 9:59pm

The Nose Knows

Use the Sniffer for a total of 2 hours
Unlocked 28 Aug @ 3:40pm

Chew on This!

Throw 100 items into sand traps
Unlocked 28 Aug @ 10:00pm

Disintegrator

Fry 500 items with the plasma welder
Unlocked 22 Mar, 2022 @ 4:11am

The Mops Of Wrath

Complete Athena's Wrath Level
Unlocked 27 Aug, 2017 @ 2:19pm

Anti-Virus

Complete Caduceus Level
Unlocked 18 Mar, 2022 @ 5:59pm

Ice-Cold Cleana

Complete Cryogenesis Level
Unlocked 23 Mar, 2022 @ 2:55pm

Sandblasted

Complete Unearthly Excavation Level
Unlocked 2 Sep @ 5:34am

Pine Fresh

Complete Hydroponic Hell Level
Unlocked 24 Mar, 2022 @ 9:35am

Surgical Sweeper

Complete Evil Science Level
Unlocked 23 Mar, 2022 @ 7:17am

Deep-Sea Dry-cleaning

Complete Paintenance Level
Unlocked 26 Mar, 2022 @ 6:18pm

Operation Brownwash

Complete Waste Disposal Level
Unlocked 28 Aug @ 3:44pm

Refined

Complete Unrefinery Level
Unlocked 28 Aug, 2017 @ 10:18am

One Mop To Rule Them All

Complete All major Official Levels
Unlocked 2 Sep @ 5:34am

Pass The Torch

Take a lit flare from a fellow Janitor
Unlocked 2 Sep @ 12:19pm

Louis and Clean

Complete Gravity Drive Level
Unlocked 28 Aug @ 8:08pm

Big Banger Burnout

Tame the uncontrollable fury of the Big Banger by incinerating it
Unlocked 27 Aug, 2017 @ 2:10pm

Clean Freak

Cleanup your own personal Office by removing any Trash, Viscera and Blood; excluding trophies, then leave
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2022 @ 12:45am

Employee of the Year

Receive 12 Employee of the Month awards
Unlocked 26 Mar, 2022 @ 6:18pm

Identity Theft

Steal 30 or more Personal Identification Devices (P.I.Ds) from cleaned levels and take them to your office
Unlocked 18 Mar, 2022 @ 3:43pm

Bring the Thunder

Take the Big Banger Supernova out of Unearthly Excavation and into another work-site and turn it on
Unlocked 2 Sep @ 5:41am

Master of the Beats

Turn off the Big Banger while it's playing loudly(keep your music volume up too) in zero-gravity during a Solo game
Unlocked 25 Mar, 2022 @ 6:30pm

Plague Bearer

Transfer a Goo-Jar to another work-site and infect something
Unlocked 18 Mar, 2022 @ 6:04pm

Head Hunter

Collect a head from each species in cleaned levels and take them to your office
Unlocked 26 Mar, 2022 @ 6:18pm

Brushed Steel

Complete Revolutionary Robotics Level
Unlocked 18 Mar, 2022 @ 3:43pm

Bushwhacked

Complete Overgrowth Level
Unlocked 29 Aug @ 9:59pm

Bob's Legacy

Find Bob
Unlocked 1 Sep @ 2:08pm

"Red Keycard"

Unlock Bob's super secret secret stash room
Unlocked 2 Sep @ 5:35am

Keep It Secret, Keep It Safe

Find all the unique and hidden collectibles and return them to your office
Unlocked 2 Sep @ 11:05am

Eggregious

Find all the hidden painted eggs and return them to your office
Unlocked 1 Sep @ 4:08am

Lost in Space and Time

Get consumed by an inter-dimensional crack in space-time
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2022 @ 2:51pm

Wicked Unliving

Collect the chainsaw, boomstick, cursed hand and the evil book and return them to your office
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2022 @ 2:53pm

Thursday the 12th

Collect the mask and machete and return them to your office
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2022 @ 2:53pm

Bad Dreams on Helm Street

Collect the clawed glove and return it to your office
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2022 @ 2:53pm

Harroween

Collect the white mask and butcher knife and return them to your office
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2022 @ 2:53pm

The Shimmering

Collect the axe and return it to your office
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2022 @ 2:53pm

Never Put It On

Collect the ring and return it to your office
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2022 @ 2:53pm

House of Honor

Clean the entire House of Horror level
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2022 @ 2:53pm

Back From Whence It Came

Destroy the Bad Banger
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2022 @ 7:55am

Not Quite a Lumberjack

Destroy 200 items in the woodchipper
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2022 @ 10:55am

Cleanliness is Godliness

Completely clean all mess in Santa's Workshop and clock off
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 2:45pm

Christmas Crisis Corrected

Completely clean Santa's Workshop without breaking any Christmas items and clock off
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 2:45pm

Sanitized Earth

Completely clean all mess and destroy every item in Santa's Workshop and clock off
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 4:47pm

Bloody Incompetent

Prove your incompetence by leaving a worse mess in Santa's Workshop and clock off
Unlocked 2 Sep @ 11:08am

St. Nick's Boomstick

Collect Santa's shotgun and bring it back to your office
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 2:45pm

The Red Nose Knows

Collect the iconic reindeer nose and bring it back to your office
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 2:45pm

Rooks Kept

Collect the different Rooks Keep figurines and take them back to your office
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 2:48pm

Ballistic Weaponry

Collect the different Ballistic Weapons toys and bring them back to your office
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 2:52pm

Thunder Candle

Requisition a new replacement janitor through the use of TNT
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 2:20pm

Head Hunter

Collect elf heads and bring them back to your office, you freakin' psycho!
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 2:52pm

Santa Hats Must Die!

Incinerate 50 Santa hats, the symbol of everything you hate
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 3:02pm

Tower of Babel

Build a stack of 10 stools
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 2:42pm

The Day the Funk Died

Bring about the sad meeting of Ice-Cold Banger and fire
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 2:51pm

Cold Storage

Complete Frostbite Level
Unlocked 27 Aug, 2017 @ 5:10pm

Biomassive Breakdown

Complete Incubation Emergency Level
Unlocked 31 Aug @ 7:20am

Sanitary Supremacy

Completely clean the entire Shadow Warrior temple level
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 5:56pm

Mr. Two Million Dollars

Collect the two million dollars of cold hard cash from the Shadow Warrior level all at once and bring it back to your office
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 5:56pm

Swept Under The Carpet

Complete Uprinsing Level
Unlocked 26 Mar, 2022 @ 4:16pm

Crystal Clear

Complete Core Sample Level
Unlocked 21 Mar, 2022 @ 11:38pm

Pest Control

Complete Pestilent Penitentiary Level
Unlocked 30 Aug @ 12:22pm

Bleach and Clear

Complete Penumbra Level
Unlocked 29 Aug @ 5:49pm

Audacious Oddities

Find all the unique Collectibles in the Vulcan Affair and return them to your office
Unlocked 27 Aug @ 9:26pm

Lair Care

Clean the entire Vulcan Affair level
Unlocked 27 Aug @ 9:26pm

Teeth for Tunes

Bring about the unfortunate meeting of Double-Oh Banger and Shark
Unlocked 27 Aug @ 12:38pm

Blood in the Water

Go for a swim with Sharks
Unlocked 27 Aug @ 12:22pm

We're Gonna Need a Bigger Tank

Feed the ever hungry Sharks 500 items they can either devour or destroy
Unlocked 27 Aug @ 4:03pm

Double-Oh Dumbass

Foolishly activate the Death Ray
Unlocked 27 Aug @ 5:22pm

Locked In

Lock another player inside a holding cell where they belong
Unlocked 2 Sep @ 12:24pm

Death From Above

Get turned into mist by an orbital beam weapon
Unlocked 27 Aug @ 9:41pm

Cat-astrophe

Using an orbital beam weapon, destroy the symbol of your most hated overlord; cats!
Unlocked 27 Aug @ 9:37pm

Orbital Bang-bardment

Allow the Banger to ascend to its rightful place among the heavens through the use of an orbital beam weapon
Unlocked 27 Aug @ 9:40pm