bro's not even a gooner

bro's not even rotted in the brain

what the ♥♥♥♥ is wrong with you

Mewing to Skibidi toilet, I was looking for a munt buddy in ishowspeed's twitch chat. Suddenly, I was mogged by ishowspeed, ending my jelqing streak and fanum taxing my robux like a level one crook.

“Chat, I’m cooked” I exclaimed, while schizophreniamaxxing.

I was no longer able to efficiently edge to CaseOh streams, or felch fembussy jelq juice. My aura was ratioed by baby gronk. I was no longer sigma. Stripped of my Ohio crown I no longer rizzed gyats for real. Forever to take Ls. My v-bucks were spent. All I could do, was goon.

And so, I gooned. Goon sessions turned from hours to days, from days to weeks, weeks to months. Blood, sweat, tears, jizz. While gooning, I mewed. While mewing, I exercised a positive canthal tilt. I looksmaxxed for real, on god. I would mog ishowspeed and reclaim my grimace shake the ocky way.

It is time. It’s motion. I edge my way to the beast. Ready to reclaim my rightful glory as the goated ohio mogman.

“Chat, is this real?” I break my mewing steak.

I made my way to the goon cave of ishowspeed. In the lair of the beast, the cringe-noise intensified. I could hear him spazzing like an ipad kid, bro was ipadkidmaxxing. Rizzing up his chat composed of children. Bro, was cooked. The stage 5 brainrot was real, on god. I was ready, I will mog you ishowspeed. I am sigma.

“I am here for your gyatt, ishowspeed! I am here to mog you. Your battlepass is expired, cry more. You will not edge your way out of this.”

Ishowspeed cried more for his chat, shaken by my +1,000,000 aura.

“Your chat cannot save you now.” I said.

With a swift movement of my fist-clenched drake-snake I ended my gooning streak of many months all over ishowspeed’s streaming setup. My sigma-goo covered his computer, effectively ending his stream. The beast began to shriek. The cringe-noise reached ear-shattering decibels as his body began to violently spasm. The atoms composing the fibres of his being began to decompose as what sustained them had abruptly ended, chat donations. Bro’s cooked.

As the last of his lifeblood drain from the beast I yap.

“I’ve mogged you, ishowspeed”

“I am sigma”