I have committed many war crimes in Africa, the Balkans, the Caucasus and South East Asia. I am a veteran of Vietnam, Korea and Afghanistan. I burned 18 Mosques, 34 Churches, 16 Synagogues and destroyed the African ugugu tribe with a single pocket knife. I can escape a spetsnaz team naked. I was in the same environment with Hitler, Osama bin Laden and Carlos the Jackal. I can lift a fully grown tobacco baron over my head with its donkey