First playthrough: Crashlanded with three survivors; two guys and an unlucky gal. Stuck with the traits of being irresistible (Beautiful trait) but uninterested in men (Gay trait), this was gonna be a bumpy ride for her--She knew it, the guys knew it, just about all the wildlife that had gathered at the sight of the crashlanding knew it, but most importantly... I knew it.

By the end of the first day, both of the guys were already getting rebuffed by the poor misses just trying to lay the roofing down to the absolute atrocity that one of the guys (we'll call him Aaron) with a construction skill of 2 had thrown together as a pathetic excuse for a makeshift home. All my pawns were at a minor risk of a mental breakdown, and once again--so was I. Her life was looking to be a constant hellish stream of corny pick-up lines followed by backbreaking work for the advancement of this colony.

A week goes by and Aaron has already entered the state of wandering the map in a daze, his heart having been broken time and time again by the girl he knew he wanted but could never have, things were looking pretty bleak for my only pawn who was medically capable.

It definitely didn't help when Randy (Storyteller) thought it would be funny to send a pack of mahunting Muffalos at my already mentally broken pawns. Down goes Aaron, still wandering the outskirts of my colony like the pitiful slob of sadness he was. It wasn't very long until my misses (we'll call her Bianca) and my remaining gentleman (who we'll call Atlas) had followed in reaching the state of needing to be rescued. I sat patiently in anticipation of a miracle. Muttering words to myself like "Where's my red bull" and "Get me another red bull you lazy slack of ♥♥♥♥", which thinking back now was probably directed towards my poor, poor roommate rather than to myself.

Just as I was about ready to give in and cry myself to sleep, there it was. A miracle--in all its beaming glory.


I've never seen anything like it before. A man in black here to save the day. I was so glad I didn't even bother to check his stats or bio page. He rescued Aaron first, and there I sat as I watched the man in black walk his way back to my house with Aaron who was just 4 hours away from bleeding to death. After liberating Aaron from certain death, he made his way back out to rescue Atlas and Bianca, they too were knocking on Death's door. As he patched the colonists back up, I considered lowering the volume on my Logitech Z213 Compact Speaker System so my roommate can finally get some sleep. I, of course, rejected such a foolish proposition. Instead, I shuffled deeper into my seat and watched the man in black display his complete incompetence in the medical field.

Looking back now, I probably should have just increased the game speed. But that would make me a sensible man; of which I am not.

As he was wrapping it up and just about done tending my last colonist I noticed he had come with the traits of Nudist (receives a mood debuff when wearing clothes), Brawler (receives a mood debuff if equipped with a ranged weapon and much more likely to get into fights) and Pyromaniac (enters a mental state every few days where she/he starts setting things on fire). I didn't think much of it at that instant and just noted that I ought to keep an eye on him until this whole charade has passed.


Things were starting to look promising, I was gonna get my colony back on track and before long we'll sleep among the stars once again! By break of dawn, Atlas was no longer incapable of getting up and Bianca was no longer incapacitated. Aaron seemed like he was gonna be out for the long haul but I couldn't care less about that miserable little bastard.

The man in black made himself at home by stripping himself of all his black clothes leading me to believe he wasn't really the man in black and rather a pale, eye-blinding white. I asked politely if he could get himself a suntan and found it was quite rude that he didn't respond at all and instead continued stripping off his clothes.

Before long, Atlas had gotten up but... almost immediately the man in black had gone to beat him back down into shock. And then did the same thing with Bianca not too long later as she tried to get up. He even put the colonists back into their beds after they went into shock. The guy then used the remainder of my medicine to patch up on Atlas and Bianca. When I'd completely run out of medicine, he had a mental breakdown and went over to Aaron to beat him to death, and proceeded to light the whole house on fire. Once the house was sufficiently on fire his mental break wore off, where he then immediately had another minor break that was “lock in room” he sat in his room as the entire house burned down and killed everyone.

10/10 would play again. God I love this ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ game.


RimWorld is a scifi colony management sim that seems to effortlessly weave dynamic stories around the player’s attempts to survive on an often harsh alien world. It's a life simulator, and as such it isn't about creating the perfect colony and rather it's about handling drama. Things are meant to go wrong and they WILL absolutely go wrong. It's up to you to cut your losses and place the survival of your colony over the well being of any individual. It's a game with infinite replayability and one that deserves every bit of praise that it receives. If you don't already own the game, buy it at full price. It's well worth every penny spent.