ENDGAME SPOILER!!!!
At the end of Endgame, Thanos agrees to undo everything he's done if the Avengers can beat him in a penis measuring contest, but none of the avengers even came close. Even the Hulk is shorter than Thanos by a noticeable amount, and their girth isn't even comparable. That's when, at the last moment, Captain Marvel pulls down her pants and unleashes the phattest hawg the universe has ever seen. Shamed by her immense size, Thanos undoes all that he has done, and then commits Japanese ritual suicide. AKA seppuko, He is now buried in an unmarked grave in Area 51.. salute to our fallen alien brother everyone. Don't forget to drop frankerZ's and kappa's in forsen's chat.

Boner physics Lesson:
If every male on earth got a boner at the same time, the earth's rotation would slow down. Assume there are about 3.8 billion males, with an average D ick height of about 80 cm off the ground. The average D ick weighs about 100 grams.

That's a combined mass of 380,000,000 kg of C ock

Now we must make an approximation. For simplicity's sake, let us assume the C ocks are all evenly lined up in a ring around the equator. The equation for moment of inertia of a ring is I = mass*radius^2. The radius of earth is about 6.371 million meters. Therefore the radius of the approximated D ick ring is 6,371,000 + 0.80 = 6,371,000.8 meters.

I = 380,000,000*6,371,000.8^2 = 1.5424*10^22

The Earth has a moment of inertia, I = 8.04×10^37 kg*m^2. The Earth rotates at a moderate angular velocity of 7.2921159 ×10^−5 radians/second.

So in conclusion If we all have a boner at the same time, we will collectively be able to last 0.6752 nanoseconds longer in bed. Stay hard fellas.

Hello? Hello, hello! Uh, I wanted to record a message for you, to help you get settled in on your first night. Um, I actually worked in that office before you. I’m...finishing up my last week now as a matter of fact so...I know it can be a little overwhelming, but i’m here to tell you: there’s nothing to worry about, uhh, you’ll do fine! So...let’s just focus on getting you through your first week. Ok? Uh...let’s see. First there’s an introductory greeting from the company i’m supposed to read. Eeh it’s kind of a legal thing, you know. ‘Welcome to Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza: a magical place for kids and grown-ups alike, where fantasy and fun come to life. Fazbear entertainment is not responsible for damage to property or person. Upon the discovery of the damage or death has occurred, a missing person’s report will be filed within ninety days or as soon as property and premise have been thoroughly cleaned and bleached and the carpets have been replaced.

hello! sorry for scare, but just notice profile on the Steam Community. you know how hard it are to find girls who play video game nowadays??? well, Im glad I stumble apon this little prof cause I gotta say.... ur prety cute!! ^ ((sorry for scare, no trouble ) well... I was wondering if u wanted to play tf2 with me (Im a plat sniper, so I can carry my little princes if need. =-}) CUZ I really want someone to pub wit me.. hey hey, maybe even I could get you unusual as little gift. you like Buring? Me too, me too. anyways any, do you maybe have Skype? (no scare. no scare, I iust like meating eye to eye.) if we skype, I think we could have some good buddy commucation. :)) ( i can even turn down my dubstep music in the background if you want...) add me if you want please, I jsit need friend maybe even girlfriend, to play video with.m I can be the perfect guy for you, trust!! ill buy whatever, do whatever, okay?? jsit pick up that phone and CALL. :)

hello! sorry for scare, but just notice profile on the Steam Community. you know how hard it are to find girls who play video game nowadays??? well, Im glad I stumble apon this little prof cause I gotta say.... ur prety cute!! ^ ((sorry for scare, no trouble ) well... I was wondering if u wanted to play tf2 with me (Im a plat sniper, so I can carry my little princes if need. =-}) CUZ I really want someone to pub wit me.. hey hey, maybe even I could get you unusual as little gift. you like Buring? Me too, me too. anyways any, do you maybe have Skype? (no scare. no scare, I iust like meating eye to eye.) if we skype, I think we could have some good buddy commucation. :)) ( i can even turn down my dubstep music in the background if you want...) add me if you want please, I jsit need friend maybe even girlfriend, to play video with.m I can be the perfect guy for you, trust!! ill buy whatever, do whatever, okay?? jsit pick up that phone and CALL. :)

Thank you so so much for your reply in this thread! It helped out a lot!
https://steamproxy.net/app/560380/discussions/1/1732089092459543114/