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Just kidding.
Having sex is literally the most basic, desperate, tragic, hopelessly-void-of-meaning, outrageously obnoxious, troublesome, costly, and downright pointless cry for help that the universe has ever screamed. Wow, you were born as an objectively good looking, decent looking, or perhaps borderline acceptable member of your species. WOW! INCREDIBLE! You managed to procure a willing (which in evolutionary terms, willing translates roughly to "♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ desperate for at least a few reasons") mate and managed to somehow perform the act of intercourse with her! WOW! This his literally only been taking place for HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ YEARS! WOW! Except guess what, you probably wore a condom... which means you failed at submitting yourself to an act which means absolutely nothing. The only thing left to do now is kill yourself.
When you were gone, you've had notifications on the Gaydating.co.uk.
Notifications include the following; Big strong man with juicy biceps looking for petite ginger boy
and
Small sized pinch looking for moderate sized weiner
We are glad to have you at our gay dating website and hope to see you soon!
Happy dating! ;)
YoU BeEn CaUgHt SmOkIn ThA DeViLs LetTuce SeNd 2 10 DaNk Br0s WhO LoVe ThE GaNjA.