Legend
 
 
Yeah? Can you turn down the music. What? Can you turn down the music! I'm trying to get some sleep here! Turn down the music? How's that! How's that. Is that much better? Turn down your damn music, or I'll come over there and turn it down myself! All right, sucker. You come down here, we can dance. Hello? Hello? ♥♥♥♥♥! When I don't get enough sleep, I get irritable. And you don't want to make me - 'Calling VAGAN' Wait! Who are you? Just a bean trying to get some sleep. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! You came here just to make us turn off the music? If you were listening on the phone, I said I would come here to turn it off myself. What! Are you insane?! Do you know what you just got yourself into? Do you know who I am! Do you know who my uncle is?! Yes. I do. Detective Cromwell. Good morning. Yeah. Something tells me there's nothing good about this morning. What do we got here? Multiple gunshots were reported coming from this warehouse. I was the first one to answer the call. Multiple gunshots, huh. You do know whose warehouse this is. Yes, sir. Have you gone inside yet? No, sir. I wanted to wait for backup. Well. It's here. My God. What a massacre. There's got to be a dozen, at least a dozen dead beans here. I guess I don't need this anymore. These were all Cappuccino's beans. Mm-hmm. It must have been some kind of gang war. No. This is no gang war. Cappuccino's beans might be dumb, but they know how to use a gun. There would have been other dead beans here, not just them. This something else. Well. One thing's for sure. We won't need that search warrant we were trying to get, huh. Heh. Yeah. I could live with this. Detective Cromwell. I found something here. 'This bullet casing is the property of Killer Bean' Killer Bean 'The bullet is meant for someone else' Hmm. What do you make of this? This guy's got balls. That's for sure. We got company! Let's go! Stop! Stop right there! This is the police! Hold it right there! Bad idea. Get out of the car! Get your hands where I can see them! Easy... Easy... Oh please, officer. Don't hurt me. Watch it. Vagan. I should have known I'd find you here, Detective Cromwell. What are you doing here, Vagan? Well, obviously something happened in my warehouse. I mean, can't a bean protect his own property anymore? Don't you mean, Cappuccino's property? You know, your obsession with Cappuccino has become quite amusing. Always trying to link everything back to Cappuccino.
Hummm, *sips water* hummmm, put sips water
WE BEGIN ON A COMIC.
The cover asks WHO IS SPIDER-MAN?
SPIDER-MAN (V.O.)
Alright, let’s do this one last
time. My name is Peter Parker.
QUICK CUTS of a BLOND PETER PARKER
Pulling down his mask...a name tag that reads “Peter
Parker”...various shots of Spider-Man IN ACTION.
SPIDER-MAN (V.O.)
I was bitten by a radioactive
spider and for ten years I’ve been
the one and only Spider-Man. I’m
pretty sure you know the rest.
UNCLE BEN tells Peter:
UNCLE BEN (V.O.)
With great power comes great
responsibility.
Uncle Ben walks into the beyond.
SPIDER-MAN (V.O.)
I saved a bunch of people, fell in
love, saved the city, and then I
saved the city again and again and
again...
Spiderman saves the city, kisses MJ, saves the city some
more. The shots evoke ICONIC SPIDER-MAN IMAGES, but each one
is subtly different, somehow altered.
SPIDER-MAN (V.O.)
And uh... I did this.
Cut to Spider-Man dancing on the street, exactly like in the
movie Spider-Man 3.
SPIDER-MAN (V.O.)
We don’t really talk about this.
A THREE PANEL SPLIT SCREEN: shots of Spider-Man’s “products”:
SPIDER-MAN (V.O.)
Look, I’m a comic book, I’m a
cereal, did a Christmas album. I
have an excellent theme song.
(MORE)
And a so-so popsicle. I mean, I’ve
looked worse.
MATCH CUT -- Peter, PINNED to a WALL by a mechanical tentacle
arm. KINGPIN punches Peter. GREEN GOBLIN fights Peter.
SPIDER-MAN (V.O.)
But after everything, I still love
being Spider-Man. I mean, who
wouldn’t?
Peter runs toward a SUPER-COLLIDER, something we’ll see quite
soon. Peter SLAMMED TO THE GROUND.
SPIDER-MAN (V.O.)
So no matter how many hits I take,
I always find a way to come back.
Peter GETS UP... in a shot that we will also remember, RIGHT
BEFORE GOBLIN GRABS HIM.
The collider EXPLOLDING, the force of the blast rippling
through New York.
SPIDER-MAN (V.O.)
Because the only thing standing
between this city and oblivion is
me. There’s only one Spider-Man.
And you’re looking at him.
Spider-Man WINKS. Man, he’s cool.
SMASH CUT:

MILES MORALES draws HOME-MADE STREET ART NAME-TAGS at a desk,
headphones on, singing along to a song he’s too young for
(”Sunflower”), but he doesn’t quite know the words yet.
A PHOTO of a YOUNGER MILES with his PARENTS and his UNCLE
AARON visible in the background--
RIO (O.S.)
Miles! Miles, time for school!
JEFFERSON (O.S.)
--Miles! Miles! MILES!
--Miles WHIPS OFF his headphones--
SPIDER-MAN (V.O.) (CONT'D)
2.
MILES
Yeah?!--
JEFFERSON (O.S.)
Are you finished packing for
school?
MILES
Yeah! Just ironing my last shirt!
Reveal his EMPTY BAG. He is NOT PACKED. He’s been AVOIDING
IT.
RIO
¡Vamo chacho!
--He FLIES around the room, tossing VARIOUS ITEMS into the
suitcase, throwing on a BLUE UNIFORM JACKET, the camera
catching other childhood details--
JEFFERSON (O.S.)
C’mon, you a grown man now! Let
show these teachers that. Let’s go!
RIO (O.S.)
--Miles!
INT. MILES’ APARTMENT - LIVING ROOM
BAM! The door flies open. FAST-PACED, Miles enters the living
room, where his parents get ready for the day.
MILES
Where’s my laptop?
RIO
¿Donde le dejaste?
MILES
¡Yo no se!
JEFFERSON
--If you want me to drive you we
gotta go now--
MILES
(edging away)
--No Dad, I’ll walk!--
JEFFERSON (CONT'D)
Personal chauffeur going once-
-
MILES
(continuing)
--It’s ok--
RIO
Ay Maria, este nene me tiene loca!
Miles grabs food. Mom and dad frantically cross behind him.
RIO (CONT’D)
(impatient)
Miles, gotta go!!
MILES
(chewing)
In a minute!
RIO
(sing-song)
Gotta Go-ohh...
MILES
IN A MINUTE--
EXT. STOOP - MORNING
Rio SMOTHERS an embarrassed Miles with kisses. Miles rolls
his eyes, hates it/loves it.
MILES
Mom. I gotta go...
RIO
(kissing him)
In a minute...
Miles rolls his bag down the steps as Rio calls out:
RIO (CONT’D)
Papá! Llamame! See you Friday!
MILES
Okay, mami. Hasta luego!

Okay loser
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