My mum (82F) told me (12M) to do the dishes (16) but I (12M) was too busy playing Fortnite (3 kills) so I (12M) grabbed my controller (DualShock 4) and threw it at her (138kph). She ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ died, and I (12M) went to prison (18 years). While in prison I (12M) incited several riots (3) and assumed leadership of a gang responsible for smuggling drugs (cocaine) into the country. I (12M) also ordered the assassination of several celebrities (Michael Jackson, Elvis Presley and Jeffrey Epstein) and planned a terrorist attack (9/11). Reddit, AITA?

day in the life of a TRUE BREXIT GEEZER!!!🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🍺👴🏻 wake up and greet the wife Susan👵🏻❤️‍🔥😘 my lil princess isnt she beautiful👱🏽‍♀️🫦👟 time to take george to football👦🏼🤣⚽️ rev up the bugatti UIEEE🚗💨🤪🤪 quick stop at toby’s and LOAD UP THAT PLATE🍽🍖🫘🥔 get a pint n scran🍺🌭 pitch lookin lovely today lads⚽️🥅 JUST A BIT A BANTER🤪🤬🥁chippy makes a 38-nil loss better😔🍟🍛 pop down local pride😁👕🔴 GOOD OL PIE LOOK AT THAT!!!🥧🥧🥧 SUSAN MADE DINNER!!! LOVELY!!!🥘😍😍 pop down and have a couple a pints with the lads!!👴🏻🍻👴🏻🍻👴🏻 and finish up at the FORTRESS OF DREAMS🛌😴💤

why SIGH😔💨😤 when you can PSY😎🐴💕 instead??👌💯👍 send this📤👈👈 to 101⃣0⃣ people👬👭 who made you OPPA GANGNAM SMILE☺😸💖 today📅!!!!

.˛.°★。˛ °.★** *★* *˛.
˛ °_██_*。*./ \ .˛* .˛.*.★
˛. (´• ̮•)*˛°*/.♫.♫\*˛.* ˛_Π_____. * ˛*
.°( . • . ) ˛°./• '♫ ' •\.˛*./______/~＼*. ˛*.。˛* ˛. *。
*(...'•'.. ) *˛╬╬╬╬╬˛°.｜田田 ｜門｜╬╬╬╬ .
¯˜"*°••°*"˜¯`´¯˜"*°••°*"˜¯`¬´¯˜"*°´¯˜"*°••°*"˜¯`
ℳ𝒆𝓻𝓻𝔂 𝓒𝓱𝓻𝓲𝓼𝓽𝓶𝓪𝓼

alright so heres the 411 folks, say some gansta is dissing your fly girl, just give em one of these

Mesa sexual identify asa Jar Jar Binks. Ever since mesa was a boy, mesa being dreamin' to be a humble servant. Boss Nass tellin' me mesa can't bein' sex slave ina Otoh Gunga, but that smells stinkowiff. Mesa meetin' a biga man at duh Naboo, he spekin' he have uh mooey mooey poopa in hesa pants. From deesa day on, mesa will be maxi sex slave on da Naboo. If yousa a bombad and you be thinkin datsa eegad, esqueeze me but yousa how wude. Mesa bein' big thankful to yousa for duh understand.

We found this new site called CSGO Lotto—so I'll link it down in the description if you guys want to check it out. We were betting on it today and I won a pot of like $69 or something like that, so it was a pretty small pot, but it was like the coolest feeling ever. I ended up following them on Twitter and stuff, and they hit me up and they're talking to me about potentially doing like a skin sponsorship.

someone stop this madness, i don't even know why i get notifications everytime!

Yo fam im new!!!!!!! holds up mixtape my name is Daquan but u can call me t3h N1GgA oF d00m!!!!!!!! bruh…as u can see im a real savage. thats why i came here, 2 meet 💯% no chill ppl like me… im 16 years old (i got first hand street experience tho!!) i like 2 Netflix n chill w/ my sidepiece (cuz you know this ain't my main one, smdh) bcuz da ♥♥♥♥♥ is straight fire!!!! shes savage 2 of course but i want 2 meet more savage ppl =) like they say the more lit the squad the more lit the ♥♥♥♥♥!!!! lol…neways i hope 2 make a big squad here so give me lots of retweets!!!! WHYTHISNIGGADRAKELOOKLIKEASAUDIWARLORD?????!!!!!!!!!! <--- me bein savage again _^ hehe…stay real fam!!! ! !

if bae 💑💏 got HIV 💉🏥😷💀 it's bout to turn into HI-WE 👫 cause we in this together 😍😘

hey, sorry I saw your profile and I just thought you looked cute in your picture, I really wanted to tell you that)) It's really rare to see girls playing video games haha! I don't know why its a guy thing honestly im like really against misogyny and like ill be the one in the kitchen making sandwiches. We should really play l4d2 sometime its a really cool zombie game with a lot of scary moments, but don't worry ill be there to protect you ;) sorry that wasnt flirting I swear Im just trying to be friendly I really like your profile picture sorry was that too far? Really sorry i'm really shy I don't go out much haha add me on skype we should talk more you look really nice and fun xxx

YOU HAVE BEEN VISITED BY THE ISLAMIC TRUCK OF TOLERANCE

______________¶___
|religion of peace ||l “”|””\__,_
|______________|||__|__|__|] beep beep!
(@)@)*********(@)(@)**(@)

My girlfriend is cute and smart and she's an anime ♥♥♥♥♥♥ like me
The other night she and I were cuddling in bed and she started humping me and whispering "oniichan oniichan" and that turned me the ♥♥♥♥ on
so I called her "oneechan" and then she stopped and looked at me and I said "what is it" to which she replied "I always wanted a twin brother so we could ♥♥♥♥ all the time" (she's an only child and all I have is a younger brother)
so all night long we were humping and calling each other oniichan and oneechan and I came in my underwear and we were pretending we were brother and sister trying to sexually please each other without having sex and it was ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ hot

nice specs bro

ALWAYS 🕔 make sure 👍 to shave 🔪🍑 because ✌️ the last time 🕒 we let 👐😪 a bush 🌳 in our lives 👈😜👉 it did 9/11 💥🏢🏢✈️🔥🔥🔥

WHOA THIS GUY HAS A ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ HUGE ♥♥♥♥

UNDERTALE PRIDE METER:
█████████████████ Over 9000%
If you're proud to be an Undertale fan,
stick this on your page.

………….……………………. „-/*"\„,„,
…….…………………….¸„-^"¯ :\_ / o '"*'"¯/' WOOF WOOF
……………………¸„„-^"¯ : : : : : : : : ¸„,-~"
**¯¯¯'^^~-„„„----~^*'"¯ : : : : : : : : : :¸-"
.:.:.:.:.„-^" : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : :- GIVE THIS CUTE DOG
:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.: : : : : : : : : : ¸„-^¯ TO PEOPLE YOU LOVE
.::.:.:.:.:.:.:.:. : : : : : : : ¸„„-^¯
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:.: : : : : : : : : : : : 'Ì
: : : : : : :, : : : : : :/
"-„_::::_„-*__„„~"

wait no he didn't hhaha oops :3 :3

don't trade with this guy, he scammed me BIG TIME :-( ♥♥♥♥ you kerk

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get outta town, harry

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.:.:.: : : : :" : : : : \, . . .In . . . ,/ : : : : ": : : : :.:.:.
: : : : : : :, : : : : :/ . . Arms. . . \: : : : : :,: : : : : :

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HIV-POSITIVE!!!

……………………………………….¸„„„„
…………………….…………...„--~ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°).'\
………….…………………… („-~~-„¸_….,/ì'Ì
…….…………………….¸„-^"¯( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ¸-¯"¯/'
……………………¸„„-^"¯ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡'\¸„„,-"
**¯¯¯'^^~-„„„----~^*'"¯ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡¸-"
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)„-^" : ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡„-"
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ¸„-^¯
( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ¸„„-^¯
:.' : : '\ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)¸„„-~"
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°):"-„""***/*'ì¸'¯
:.':( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡:"-„ ( ͡° ͜ʖ\
.( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° \,
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ 'Ì
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ/
"-„_::::_„-*__„„~"

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i bet u dont even smoke weed u casual

⊂_ヽ
　 ＼＼
　　 ＼( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
　　 　⌒ヽ
　　　/ 　 へ＼
　　 /　　/　＼＼
　　 ﾚ　ノ　　 ヽ_つ
　　/　/
　 /　/|
　(　(ヽ
　|　|、＼
　| 丿 ＼ ⌒)
　| |　　) /
`ノ )　　Lﾉ
(_／

░░░░░░░▐██████████████████▌ AT THIS MOMENT
░░░░░░░███████████████████▌ I AM EUPHORIC
░░░░░░▐███████████████████▌ NOT BECAUSE OF GOD
░░░░░░█████████████████████▄ BUT BECAUSE OF MY OWN
░░░▄█▐█▄█▀█████████████▀█▄█▐█▄ INTALECT
░▄██▌██████▄█▄█▄█▄█▄█▄█████▌██
▐████▄▀▀▀▀████████████▀▀▀▀▄███ POST THIS TO ALL YOUR
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░░░▀▀████████████████████▀ IF YOU GET ONE BACK UR A ♥♥♥♥♥

..........*
╚═( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)═╝
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╚═(███)═╝ HIDE YER ANUS B4 HE REKS UR ASS TO MAXIMUM SIZE
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▄░▐░░░▄▄░█░▀▀ U HAVE BEEN SPOOKED BY THE
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You're the best.

+rep patient, polite, and a good cool guy

+rep fast trader

+REP Very Very Very GOOD TRADER ! :D

+rep great trader

+rep fast and efficent trader

+rep lovely trader

the wizard approves of this profile