On day 8,299 of nofap.


Facts about me:
- I have visited Area 51.
- I know the whereabouts of the lost city of Atlantis.
- I have had a meeting with God.
- Many sasquatches voluntarily approach me, drawn to my aura of good.
- I completed Super Mario 64 in just two minutes.
- Using a discovered cheat, I beat Half-Life 2 in a mere one second.
- I predicted the infamous Oscar mix-up between La La Land and Moonlight five years before it occurred while in Las Vegas.
- I received all my training from a guy.

(updated 08/09/24)