Recent reviews by HeatedCoffin

Server browser lags like it's 1998.
Game's poorly optimized, stay away.

Feeble attempt at a civ-clone.
It's really just an Endless Legend reskin, might as well save your money and buy Endless Legend.

GAME-BREAKING BUG: 10 hours into a game, minions will no longer construct.
Minions assigned to construction just stand around like zombies, or just stare at the thing they're meant to build. DO NOT BUY.

The game is essentially an upgrade from the original, where the gameplay remains the same. That is a good thing.

From there however, it goes downhill fast. From mid-game out, it becomes an endless slog of balancing your funds between a full bank account and bankruptcy, demanding tiresome micromanagement for most of the time spent in my 50-hours playthrough. Where in the original game the world map was a never-ending supply of money, it now comes down to RNG if there's money at all on the map. At some point, there won't be any opportunities for you to gain funds. If (when) you're unable to pay your minions their wage due to a lack of funds, they will leave, prompting a half-hour of 'Minion desahting' voiced messages repeated every five seconds ad nauseum. This was not properly playtested, or it would have been dealt with.

I had more fun with the original, and I think you will too. There were some QoL changes released in the first month after launch, but there's still much room for improvement. Get this on sale, not before.

You'll spend too much time micro-managing your economy to actually play the game, it's like Flappy Bird, but in a resource market place where you have more mineral income than you can spend, to suddenly be running out.

If you manage your economy well however, the game is still so bug-riddled you won't be able to enjoy it. Enemy fleets can suddenly become invincible with no warning! Did you spend lots of resources on a large fleet? It won't matter if the enemy fleet of 1/10th size is bugged and doesn't take damage, you will lose your precious fleet and all the resources that went into it. This bug is several years old, just Google 'Invincible fleet bug stellaris', and you'll see just how little devs care about game-breaking bugs.

If you were expecting Fallout 4 Online, think again.

Your hopes of exploring cool new areas, and doing engaging quests, are forever locked behind Bethesda's ineptitude and complete lack of playtesting. Did you encounter a game-breaking bug during an instanced quest? Your only option is to start that quest over from scratch, again and again and again and again, kill the same mobs, the same boss, skip through the same dialogue over and over, until you finally do a run where no bugs impede your progress. If you thought previous Bethesda games were buggy, imagine encountering those in an online setting, without quick-save, without command console. Were this Fallout 4, I could just quick load and try again. But it isn't. All the ammo, food and drink I spent on the previous attempts is now gone, I need to restock, repair my gear, clear out my inventory. Because in Fallout 76, inventory is not infinite, F76 is a Inventory Management Simulator, where you only get to keep what you need right now. I'm not even mad about that, I think it's brilliant as it stimulates the player economy. But it's such a slap in the face when I have to spend 30 minutes preparing supplies for another run in a bug-riddled instanced quest for the 4th time, on account of Bethesda devs' preference to code one-handed, with the other hand tumbling each other's dingleberries.

NPCs were added only a few months ago, and perhaps the intention was to iron out the bugs based on feedback post-launch. That's right, Bethesda, whose games are characterized by vast open worlds, made immersive by its inhabiting characters, added NPCs only recently, as an afterthought. And it shows. Whenever a dialogue ends and an NPC is supposed to do something for you, like open a locked door, you hold your breath, praying Bethesda didn't screw this up for once.

Playtest your games Bethesda, finding bugs can be hard, but when a quest is broken 5 times in a row in different parts of it, I know for a fact you haven't even bothered to check. Disappointing.

The gameplay is about as deep as this review.

oblivion 2: frosty boogaloo

WARNING - Sweaty players ONLY

If you want to chill and relax while enjoying the A E S T H E T I C, this is not the game for you. It's made for sweaty nerds with superhuman reflexes, and nobody else. Otherwise a beatuifully made game at a low price.

It's all fun and games, until your 3 trading partners attack you all three at once. I give this game a 2/10, and hope devs never make another game.

I don't even play the game anymore, and still got the season pass. It's that good.