Haxard
Kansas, United States
 
 
:nitra::titanium::morkite::orichalcix::Tiberium::Gauntlet_Gold::goldvein:

:Horzine::Q2_Double::biohazard:___:gauntletpointer:(:demoneye:):redbeard:(:demoneye:):Fistofdosh: [www.twitch.tv]
Zurzeit online
Screenshots
Videos
Lieblingsgruppe
Haxard's Group - Öffentliche Gruppe
Wake up and smell the ashes
7
Mitglieder
0
Im Spiel
5
Online
5
Im Chat
John Dies at the End - David Wong
Solving the following riddle will reveal the awful secret behind the universe, assuming you do not go utterly mad in the attempt. If you already happen to know the awful secret behind the universe, feel free to skip ahead.

Let's say you have an ax. Just a cheap one, from Home Depot. On one bitter winter day, you use said ax to behead a man. Don't worry, the man was already dead. Or maybe you should worry, because you're the one who shot him.

He had been a big, twitchy guy with veiny skin stretched over swollen biceps, a tattoo of a swastika on his tongue. Teeth filed into razor-sharp fangs--you know the type. And you're chopping off his head because, even with eight bullet holes in him, you're pretty sure he's about to spring back to his feet and eat the look of terror right off your face.

On the follow through of the last swing, though, the handle of the ax snaps in a spray of splinters. You now have a broken ax. So, after a long night of looking for a place to dump the man and his head, you take a trip into town with your ax. You go to the hardware store, explaining away the dark reddish stains on the broken handle as barbecue sauce. You walk out with a brand-new handle for your ax.

The repaired ax sits undisturbed in your garage until the spring when, on one rainy morning, you find in your kitchen a creature that appears to be a foot-long slug with a bulging egg sac on its tail. Its jaws bite one of your forks in half with what seems like very little effort. You grab your trusty ax and chop the thing into several pieces. On the last blow, however, the ax strikes a metal leg of the overturned kitchen table and chips out a notch right in the middle of the blade.

Of course, a chipped head means yet another trip to the hardware store. They sell you a brand-new head for your ax. As soon as you get home, you meet the reanimated body of the guy you beheaded earlier. He's got a new head, stitched on with what looks like plastic weed-trimmer line, and it's wearing that unique expression of "you're the man who killed me last winter" resentment that one so rarely encounters in everyday life.

You brandish your ax. The guy takes a long look at the weapon with his squishy, rotting eyes and in a gargly voice he screams, "That's the same ax that beheaded me!"

Is he right?

:ironaxe::spacemarineskull:
Lieblingsspiel
1.398
Stunden gespielt
285
Errungenschaften
Lieblingsguide
Erstellt von - Haxard
2 Bewertungen
Compilation of blueprints I have made, imported, or modified to use as a template for my factories. Efficiency not guaranteed, overkill encouraged. The factory must grow. Version 1.1
Kürzliche Aktivitäten
97 Std. insgesamt
zuletzt gespielt am 22. März
434 Std. insgesamt
zuletzt gespielt am 22. März
325 Std. insgesamt
zuletzt gespielt am 21. März
Haxard 7. März um 10:55 
:nidhogg::propaganda:(:retreat::stress::cleandino:)
Licorize 25. Dez. 2024 um 12:18 
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEMAH :sharkfeesh::partyduck:
HellishWoman 24. Dez. 2024 um 16:12 
Merry Xmas, gamer! 🎄🎮🎁
Licorize 17. Nov. 2024 um 10:37 
HAPPY LATE H@LLOWEEN! ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ this thing didnt show me the notif bs. :sharkfeesh:
Maziecat 31. Okt. 2024 um 20:10 
:dredge_eyes: :carrionmouth: :dredge_eyes:
Haxard 11. Okt. 2024 um 17:47 
__:wwzvoltage:
_:wwzvoltage::wwzvoltage:
:wwzvoltage::wwzvoltage::wwzvoltage: