-rep hacker :)

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Put this on the profile of people who are known/wanted terrorists that were involved in the September 11th, 2001 attacks. ●▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬♥๑۩۩๑♥▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬●

+rep great trader

+rep nice AWPer

merry christmas

BARRY
Yeah, but, as a terrorist. Let’s
hear the voice.
FESSAL
(no change to the voice) “Can I
have twelve bottles of bleach
please”.
Barry’s face is a clean slab of disbelief.
And then I got one like this as
well(again no change)“Can I have
twelve bottles of bleach please”
BARRY
What’s that?
FESSAL
(to Hassan and Barry)
It’s a woman’s voice. Cos I got
loads of liquid peroxide.
Probably thought she’d go in
there and..
BARRY
And what?
FESSAL
Dye her hair or something.
BARRY
And her beard?
FESSAL
What?
BARRY
You’ve got a beard
FESSAL
I covered it.
BARRY
You covered your beard yeah. How?
Fessal covers his beard, badly, with his hands.
BARRY
Right. So you went into a shop
with your hands on your face like
that and asked for twelve bottles
of bleach? So why has she got her
hands on her face, Fess?
FESSAL
Cos she’s got a beard.

FESSAL
Three years of stockpiling.
BARRY
Where did you get it all?
FES
A wholesale shop down the road.
BARRY
What? All from the same shop?
FESSAL
Yeah.
BARRY
You mug. You’ll get us nicked.
FESSAL
No - I use different voices every
time I go in.
BARRY
Different what?
FESSAL
Different voices.
BARRY
Different voices? Show me.
FESSAL
What?
BARRY
Show me the voices. Come on.
FESSAL
Well one of them’s, my voice “can I
have twelve bottles of bleach
please”
BARRY
Yeah I know what that sounds
like. Give me another one.
FESSAL
IRA voice.
BARRY
IRA voice? They’re terrorists
Fessal. What you wanna do a
terrorist voice for? You’ll get
us nicked.
FESSAL
I’ll be in disguise though won’t
I?

OMAR
Waj, go away right now.
CUT TO:
21 EXT. FESSAL'S LOCK UP GARAGE - BELOW HIS FLAT. DAY. **
Wide shot. Barry, Hassan and Fessal. Approach one garage in a
backstreet of 14. Fessal is fiddling with lock.
BARRY
Woah, woah, woah (checks for
surveillance) follow me man.
Fessal opens up the garage door. About 2 feet. They all have
to crawl in. The others keeping watch. The last - Fessal -
having to check for himself. They enter. Hassan filming on
his phone. The floor is covered with bottles of bleach &
screw top wine bottles - also containing bleach.
Fessal talking to Hassan past cam.
HASSAN
Woah, liquid peroxide.

Khalid rips the phone to bits and stamps on it. Then
carries on whacking Waj.
KHALID (CONT’D)
(arabic) Tomorrow, when we
crossing valley to meet sheikh -
you no! Stay here & clean guns.
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
22
Massive shocked beat. Waj and Omar stricken - outbursts
despite himself.
OMAR
No, no, no listen! - We need an
al Qaeda emir.
KHALID
(turns on Omar arabic)
Shut your bawling English face.
WAJ
(bravely, pained) It were my
fault bro, let Omar go.
KHALID
(english) Both stay! Both - off
the jihad - (arabic) After
tomorrow you go back to ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
England - you English donkey - &
you - (english) ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Mr Beanz.
OMAR
But we haven’t got an emir yet.
He turns & strides off. Omar - furious and helpless - Waj
broken.
WAJ
I were just getting me pictures
bro.

BARRY
(pounces on Hass &
clasps him in a hug,
saying quietly )
Come here. ♥♥♥♥ you Omar!
CUT TO:
20 EXT. TRAINING ENCAMPMENT. PAKISTAN. DAY. **
Waj is holding his gun and talking to a phone he has
propped up using a pile of rocks as his tripod.
WAJ
(to camera in presenter mode)
Big enough for you now Barry?
(he fires a burst)
Am I blowing a dog in a ditch -
or am I ♥♥♥♥ Rambo.
He fires the gun in the air & laughs. Khalid running out of
the shed - past a parked donkey.
KHALID
Stop! stop! (arabic) you stupid
donkey’s ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥.
Omar arrives running, from another direction.
WAJ
Getting me pictures - mujahid
style!
Khalid grabs the gun. Grabs the phone. Jabs Waj with the
gun.
KHALID
(arabic) You making signals like
you're (english) James ♥♥♥♥ Bond?
OMAR
No! ... no he's not!
(to Waj) How did you-?
KHALID
(furious arabic- hurting waj)
These make signals & drones see
them and attack us you piece of
camel sphincter!

He lets the car into gear and drives idiotically into the
wall. Looks at Hassan, nodding.
BARRY
That was for real brother.
HASSAN
Yup.
Hassan looks to the door, Barry locks the car doors from
the inside.
BARRY
Are you for real as that?
Hassan stares back - 90% speechless. Nodding. Wide-eyed.
HASSAN
Yup.
BARRY (CONT'D)
How often d'you go to mosque?
HASSAN
(very back foot) Er - when I can -
most weeks -
BARRY
(interrupts) Once a year is too
often! The Mosques have lost it
brother- they're full of losers and
spies.
Hassan is boggling.
BARRY
These are real bad times bruv -
Islam is cracking up - we got
women talking back - we got
people playing stringed
instruments- Thomas the tank
engine - it's the end of days.
Do you wanna be for real?
HASSAN
(quite small now) Yeah of course.
BARRY
Are you sure?
HASSAN
A hundred per cent.

Barry is suddenly angry. Hassan looks alarmed.
BARRY
Yeah you're not ignorant like them.
You know you should be doing
something.
HASSAN
But I am doing something.
BARRY
Oh, what that?!
(impersonates Hassan)
“i’m the mujahideen thingy thing
rap rap”? Huh?
HASSAN
It was jihad of the mind - the
gesture that messed yer ….
BARRY
Was the prophet Sal Allaahu
Alayhi wa Sallam about gestures?!
Did he smash the pagan statues?
Or did he just stand there making
a gesture? Is this a gesture?!

EXT. NORTHERN UNIVERSITY/EXT. BARRY’S CAR - LATER. DAY. **
Hassan leaves the building. He trips down the steps pleased
with himself, Barry is there waiting for him by his car.
BARRY
Hey bro, bro, down here. Need a
lift?
Hassan checks him, recognizes him from the panel. His eyes
widen, he looks delighted.
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
19
HASSAN
Yeah man wait, yeah.
CUT TO
19 INT BARRY'S CAR/EXT. NORTHERN RED BRICK UNIVERSITY. LATER. **
Hassan is now sat in the car with Barry. (Static.)
HASSAN
Oh man, you’re a ledge, you’re a
ledge bro
BARRY
You’re not so bad yourself brother
- wass your name?
HASSAN
Hassan Malik - the Mal.
BARRY
The Mal. Nice little stunt back
there. (sudden change) But you
know what, you're a total piece
of ♥♥♥♥ mate. You're worse than
the specially trained rapists
they use in Guantanamo.
HASSAN
You what?

xd

HASSAN (CONT'D)
Yeah mashallah?
(starts rapping)
Yeah, I'm da mujahideen, an I'm
makin a scene, now you'z gonna feel
what the boom boom mean, its like
Tupak said when I die I'm not dead,
we are the martyrs, you're just
smashed tomataz - Allahu akbar!
He pulls his cord - his bombs are party poppers. There's
confusion - a few shrieks - people not sure what's happened.
Hassan reveling in his big point. Barry is the first to fill
the stunned gap.
BARRY
Mashallah, brother.
Hassan is being dragged off by University Security, as he
berates the audience.
HASSAN
Oh what man come on? What, just coz
I'm Muslim you thought this was
real?
Barry turns to another panelist:
BARRY
Police state. Police state. This
is oppression! He’s being
rendered. He’s being rendered.

HASSAN
(applauding Barry) Yeah! Yeah! Man.
This whole debate is twisted, man.
CHAIR
We'll take questions later pleaseHASSAN
Nah, nah, nah, man, you think we're
all bombers don't you?!
MALCOLM STORGE MP
That is absolutely not the case.
The panel stare at him - on the verge of saying no
HASSAN CONT
Nah, nah, nah, when you look at
someone like me, you think
'bomber,' right?
There's a rising sense of tension.
BARRY
Yeah you do.
MALCOLM STORGE MP
That is not the case.
HASSAN
So why shouldn't I be a bomber, if
you treat me like one?
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
18
BARRY
Mashallah brother
Hassan opens his coat to reveal a bomb belt. There's a beat
of stillness and uncertainty - people lean away from him, but
it all feels unreal.

BARRY
(disbelief) No I did not - It's a
Western fantasy - you people think
of Muslims running around the
mountains with guns and bombs.
Yeah, that'd suit you down to the
ground, wouldn’t it!
CHAIR
But - they do exist don't they?...
BARRY
I’m not saying they don't exist.
What I'm saying is - if you'll
listen - is that if they didn't
exist, you people would have to
invent them.
MALCOLM STORGE MP
That’s absolute rubbish.
Suddenly a young Asian man is on his feet and shouting.
HASSAN. 20. British Pakistani, ex public school. He's a
wannabe. In a puffer jacket.

MACOLM STORGE MP
...in depth knowledge of Islam but
what I do know is that most British
Muslims they don’t want to be out
abroad fighting British foreign
policy what they want to do is get
on peacefully with their daily
lives and we support them...
BARRY
Yeah “A good Muslim always keeps
his mouth shut”-yeah- And you're
surprised kids are going off to
training camps?
MALCOLM STORGE MP
That is not what I’m saying...
CHAIRWOMAN
(turning to Barry) So why are kids
going off to training camps?
BARRY
Right well first off, I object to
the term 'training camps'.
CHAIRWOMAN
You just used it.

KHALID (CONT’D)
(Arabic) too high! (English) too
high!
OMAR
That’s what I was thinking. What
is that? Two thousand feet?
KHALID
(in disbelief) What?
CUT TO:
16 EXT. NORTHERN RED BRICK UNIVERSITY - EVENING **
Establishing shot.
CUT TO:
17 INT. UNIVERSITY LECTURE THEATRE - EVENING **
A well-attended University Islamic Society debate is under
way in a lecture theatre, a mixed White/Asian audience. A
banner behind the stage reads “Islam - moderation and
progress” with a smaller subtitle “Hallbeck College ISOC
Debate”. Barry is on the panel along with religious-looking
older Muslim imam, a suited male White MP, a journalist
white woman. Chairwoman is Asian, in a headscarf but very
westernized.

(explaining as if to a child)
Mecca’s in the east yeah?
(enunciates slowly) where the
(points, mimes a sphere) sun -
the sun yeah? Where it rises you
behn choad ♥♥♥♥ prong
Khalid is cross & suddenly there. Waj looks massively
massively puzzled. Khalid is not impressed. The moment is
broken by a noise from the sky. Khalid reacts suddenly -
calls the trainees in to the shelter of the camo nets
around the hut.
KHALID
(arabic) Drone take cover.
American Drone - quick!
As they duck under the nets - Omar spots the AT4 in the
back of the motorbike wheelbarrow and starts to pick it up.
Khalid knows this won’t work.
OMAR
Hey brother, I’ll take it out

the air - driver jumps back into car and leaves them there.
Alone in a big space. From 50 metres away - a voice
KHALID
(Arabic) Hurry up - morning
prayers (English) You are late.
CUT TO:
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
15
WAJ (cont'd)
14 EXT. TRAINING ENCAMPMENT. PAKISTAN. DAWN. **
They hurry over to the encampment - some camo'd tents - a
shed and a vehicle - where a bunch of mujahadeen trainees
are assembling for prayer.
CUT TO:
15 EXT. TRAINING ENCAMPMENT PRAYER AREA. PAKISTAN. DAY. **
Waj is unrolling his prayer mat - but the guy next to him
has a big problem with it
PAKISTANI MUJ
(furious punjabi) Turn around,
Mecca is over there.
Waj is puzzled - his prayer mat is facing the rising sun.
This guy is forcing him to spin 180 degrees in the opposite
direction.
WAJ
♥♥♥♥ off bro, east is that way.
Omar alerted from his prayer preparations.
OMAR
Waj we’ve flown over Mecca now.
We’ve gone past Mecca?
WAJ
(explaining as if to a child)

it, remembering)
Rubber Dingy Rapids.
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
14
(MORE)
Yeah, rubber dingy rapids! - OK I
would kill ya brother Omar! I'd
smash your head off with a thing.
OMAR
Do you know what I’d do Waj. I’d
grab one of these hooks and I’d
dig it in your belly, I’d rip
your guts out and spill them all
out like Mortal Combat.
WAJ
I'd take this right and I’d ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
run you over with a tractor.
OMAR
Yeah? Soldiers brother. Mujahid.
WAJ
Ha ha! Soldiers man! Mujahid!
Exhilarated, they high five and embrace.
OMAR
Come on
WAJ
Yeah come on, do you want some
rabbit, you ♥♥♥♥♥♥ up rabbit with
no ears.
OMAR
Waj, they’re chickens.
CUT TO:
13 EXT. CAR / ROUGH ROAD. PAKISTAN. JUST BEFORE DAWN. **
Car 4x4 side/headlights speeds through barren landscape.
Omar awake and Waj asleep on him as the car rumbles along.
Car bounces through scrub near encampment - stops. The
driver opens the door & hauls Omar & Waj out and goes round
to the back of the car. Their bags arrive rudely through

WAJ/OMAR
Wa-likumasalaam.
Uncle X leaves. Omar exhales in relief.
WAJ
(beat) Would you kill me then?
They start to reload their bags.
OMAR
(protects him) No - course not.
WAJ
(relief causing joke) I'd kill
you bro.
Beat.
OMAR
(half amused) Would you?
WAJ
Yeah.
OMAR
(what he really thinks)
Right good coz I would kill you
bro. Bro, seriously I’d kill you,
course I would! - I'd kill you
like that (clicks fingers)
WAJ
Flippin heck man would ya?
OMAR
Yeah course.
WAJ
Right, I sort of thought I were
jokin’ a bit there bro.
OMAR
We’re soldiers bro - whatever's
asked - you do it - you do the
right thing. Right, you with me?
It’s life innit, it’s just life.
What is that? Its nothing. It’s
like being stuck in the queue at
Alton Towers. Do you want be in the
queues or do you want to be on the
rides. You want to be on the rides
dont you? You want to be on Nemesis
or Oblivion.

INT. SHOP RAWALPINDI. PAKISTAN.NIGHT. **
In a back room full of junk & stores & caged chickens - Uncle
rifles through Omar and Waj’s bags. Chucking contents about
with contempt - Astronaut food, Sports Nutriment, trainers,
socks, bits of low level camping kit.
WAJ
What the ♥♥♥♥’s he going to do
with those rabbits bro.
OMAR
They’re not rabbits bro, they’re
chickens.
WAJ
They’re rabbits.
OMAR
Bro, if they’re rabbits, where
are their ears?
WAJ
That’s what I’m saying.
Uncle X brandishes an Islam for kids learning book from out
of the rucksack.
UNCLE X
(Punjabi) Would you kill him?
OMAR
What?
UNCLE X
(Punjabi) He’s an idiot - would
you kill him?
Omar is gobsmacked.
WAJ
What's he saying?
UNCLE X
(sudden English) I'm asking would
he kill you?!
The boys stare at each other - specially Waj.
UNCLE X
Pack up. If you make me trouble
(Punjabi) I'll stitch your gobs to
the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥ pipe.
He goes to leave.
UNCLE X
Salam aleykum.

EXT. AIRPORT DAY. **
Plane taking off to Pakistan.
10 EXT. RAWALPINDI STREET/ EXT. TUK TUK. PAKISTAN. - NIGHT **
High view of crowded Pakistani city. Tracking front view of
Tuk Tuk drives through the crowded streets of a Pakistani
city. New sounds.
CUT TO:
11 INT. TUK TUK/ EXT. RAWALPINDI STREET. PAKISTAN - NIGHT. **
Waj and Omar with Uncle X are rammed in a row of three -
facing out through the back. Waj is scoffing a samosa.
Uncle eyes them judgmentally. Waj is worried.
UNCLE X
(in Punjabi about Waj)
Is he as stupid as he looks?
OMAR
(checks Waj, Punjabi) No uncle.
UNCLE X
(Punjabi) So what in a
prostitute's howling trap is
this?
He pulls out Waj’s prayer reciting teddy bear.
WAJ
Me prayer bear! He does me
prayers.
Uncle considers for a moment then shouts through to the
driver.
UNCLE X
(Punjabi) Stop!
The Tuk Tuk screeches to a sudden halt outside a shop.
CUT TO:
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
12

INT. BARRY’S CAR. DAY - CONTINUOUS **
WAJ
Are they gonna make me ♥♥♥♥ a dog
out there brother Omar?
OMAR
(to Waj) Bro. My uncle's
connected. Only time we'll see
cops is for weapons upgrade!
Waj is relieved. Suddenly Barry's head bursts thru the
armrest panel in the back seat
BARRY
Alright Omar, I’m letting you go
to Pakistan. My unit stays here.
But my unit’s the main unit.
OMAR
Barry - shut up mate - because I
tell you, your little brain cell
might go off now and again but if
your hands even go to move - if
you start setting up the Islamic
state of Tinsley again - going to
university lectures opening your
big mouth - buying some more
silver nitrate from Amazon - I’m
going to rip your plugs out.
BARRY.
Not if you’re not here you won’t.
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
11
With emphatic punctuation Waj slams Barry back into the
boot and shuts the armrest on him.

EXT. LAYBY / INT. BARRY’S CAR. DAY - CONTINUOUS **
Super quick Waj piles out the car. Barry resists until Waj
sticks his thumb in his mouth, and walks Barry to the boot
of the car. Omar starts to hotwire the car. Barry complies
with the frogging physically but protests.
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
10
BARRY
What if you get caught? - I'm not
going down just coz you can't
take a drill in the knee-cap.
They'll crack you like baby's
fingers! They'll pump you full of
Viagra and make you ♥♥♥♥ a dog.
Waj opens the boot. Barry leaning in to Waj as he ties
Barry up.
WAJ
Stay still brother Barry.
BARRY
You'll end up on you tube -
blowing Lassie in a ditch.
Waj flips Barry into the car and slams the boot - Omar wirestarts
the car - Waj clambers back into the back of the car
- Omar to drive.

OMAR
(in Urdu) How's your Urdu you
mouse’s minge?
Waj and Fessal laugh. Barry knows he is stumped.
BARRY
Don't ♥♥♥♥ with me man. Don't
♥♥♥♥ with Azzam al Britani!
(himself)
Fury rising - Barry slams on the brakes - recklessly -
skidding. - pulls in to layby.
BARRY
If I'm not going no one is!
A beat. Omar looks at the ignition key. Barry whips it out
and shoves it in his gob. Waj grabs Barry’s neck, claws his
nose from behind him, & starts reaching into Barry's mouth.
Barry, making stupid gutteral noises, swallows the key.
WAJ
Its gone down his neck.
OMAR
(new plan - to Waj )
Right frog him. Frog him in the
back bro!
BARRY
(protesting)
No, no frogging, we agreed no
frogging, you said no frogging.

EXT. BARRY’S CAR / ROAD TO AIRPORT. DAY. **
CUT TO:
6 INT. BARRY’S CAR/ EXT. ROAD TO AIRPORT. DAY. **
Omar is next to Barry. Waj is in the back with Fessal.
Beady eyes. Barry is driving Omar and Waj to the airport.
Suddenly he outbursts.
BARRY
You realize if I don't come with
you to Pakistan bro Islam is
finished!
OMAR
(soothes)
Listen bro, we need you over here
to keep a lid on things.
BARRY
Sure, so what if I'm not here coz
I bought a ticket at the airport
and I come with you anyways?
Very pleased with this, tetchy Barry depockets his
passport. Omar is taken aback.
BARRY
You wanna come Fess?
Fessal is unexpectedly on the spot
FESSAL
Yeah it’s just me dads seeing
creatures that's not there.
(this is seriously alarming to
Fessal)
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
9
BARRY (cont'd)
BARRY
(to omar re Fessal)
So he'll keep it ticking over
here bro.
OMAR
(right) Barry right it you can
answer this question you can
come.
Barry nods assent.

BARRY
I’m already in the mujahideen.
OMAR
No you’re not bro. Not until you
join the army and hold the sword.
Touch the sky.
(Barry looks interested)
Proper chain of command right to
the very top.
He points up as if to indicate Allah. Barry thinking hard.
BARRY
Alright. I’m coming.
OMAR
Oh you want ♥♥♥♥ Steptoe now do
you?
BARRY
Listen I am the most Al Qaeda one
here.
OMAR
Think of the group, Barry, think
of what we’re trying to do,
right. It’s best you stay here,
Barry. You’re a liability and
you’re a loose cannon.
BARRY
Bollocks I’m a liability. I am
the invisible jihadi.
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
8
(MORE)
They seek him here, they seek him
there, but he’s not there cos
he’s blowing up your slag sister!
OMAR
Invisible? Like the time you got
on the local news for baking a
twin towers cake and leaving it
in the synagogue on 9/11.
BARRY
That was part of the plan - hide
in plain sight you mug. And I am
coming.

BARRY
What?
OMAR
Pakistan. I answered the call
bro.
BARRY
What call?
OMAR
Training camp. We’re upgrading.
We’re going.
BARRY
Why d’you get the call? Why
didn’t I get the call?
OMAR
Cos you dont have an Uncle in
Pakistan Barry, last time I
checked. You’ve got an uncle in
Folkestone. Are there any
training camps in Folkestone?
BARRY
Why do we need training camp
anyway? We’re primed! We don’t
need some tramp up a mountain
telling us to set a fuse. We
don’t need some ♥♥♥♥ Steptoe
telling us when to go!
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
7
OMAR
You’re right Barry. We can go off
any time we want.
BARRY
Exactly, whenever we want, bro.
OMAR
Yeah, if you want to be some sad
loner trenchcoat mafia twazzock.
BARRY
What do you mean?
OMAR
What I mean is - you can either
be some stupid nutter Muslim who
blows a bag full of nails into
his own guts in the toilets at
TGI’s or you can be a proper
soldier in the Mujahideen?

WAJ
Can they see you if you’re not
there?
BARRY
Where’s there?
WAJ
I don’t know.
BARRY
They can see you everywhere, Waj.
FESSAL
Are they looking at us through
cameras?
BARRY
Space cameras, yes
FESSAL
But me dad says I’m not supposed
to be on camera - it’s haram
BARRY
With the greatest of respect
Fessal your dad eats newspaper
FESSAL
Not any more. He eats moths.
BARRY
Exactly bro - look the way to
stop the Feds tracking you is
very simple - you eat your
simcard. Get your simcards out.
Remove your simcard and...
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
6
WAJ
Can I cook mine?
BARRY
No you must eat it raw. Like this
BARRY GOBS HIS SIMCARD & CHEWS. OMAR BLAMS IN THE DOOR
OMAR
Salam lads
Salams
WAJ
We’re eating our simcards
BARRY
Anti surveillance
OMAR
(joking) You know they still work
inside you Barry - they can still
track them inside you - that’s
not going to be very helpful in
Pakistan.

OMAR
(makes a decision)
I need tomorrow off.
MATT
What?
OMAR
I need tomorrow off and the two
weeks after that.
MATT
Jesus. I thought you were serious
about this job Omar?
OMAR
I’ve got to go to a wedding in
Pakistan.
MATT
You’ve got to ask yourself where
you’ll be in five years time?
OMAR
It’s an emergency.
MATT
What an emergency wedding? Like,
a shotgun wedding?
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
5
MATT (cont'd)
OMAR
Like a shotgun wedding, yeah.
MATT
Well, I’ll have a look at the
rota.
4 OMAR'S SECRET FLAT (BOMB FACTORY)- LIVING ROOM.DAY **
BARRY IS SITTING IN THE JIHADI POSITION - WAJ IS ON THE
CAMERA. THE FIRST FEW BEATS OF DIALOGUE WILL RUN OVER A
SLOW ZOOMING ESTABLISHING SHOT THAT LINKS THE SHOPPING
CENTRE VIA THE MOTORWAY TO THE BOMB FACTORY WINDOW.
BARRY
The Feds can track your phone
even if the battery’s out.
Really. They can see you
underground right...

Snack a jacks and a medium apple.
5k in the afternoon. ‘Cos
obviously it was after lunch, so.
Then same again on Sunday.
Although in the afternoon I only
did 4k cos I’d had a roast. I
would have gone further y’know
but I started to run a bit
lopsided. Yeah, I’m not slagging
my right leg off, but my left
leg’s definitely stronger.
Matt stretches the other leg. Omar is bored ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ -
looking at his laptop, occasionally registering fake signs
of listening. Suddenly something on the screen takes his
attention. In an email window - a message from Uncle P -
reads simply “wedding list full - last chance!!”
MATT (CONT’D)
I think lefty just wants it more.
Righty’s bone idle, he just waits
there let’s lefty to pick up the
slack - then before you know it
you’re running in curves - I’m
going to have to put my foot down
you know, really show him who’s
boss, you know what I mean? You
can talk to your legs you know.

BARRY
Take the box off.
FESSAL
I cant show my face because it’s
an image. An image is a haram.
OMAR LOOKS AT FESSAL WITH HIS HEAD IN THE BOX AND BACK TO
SOFIA
OMAR.
You know what, they’re all
bloopers. What am I going to do
if he does that at the camp?
(turns to Mahmood) Mahmood, do
you think Uncle Fessal’s ready to
go to Pakistan?
MAHMOOD
No way.
CUT TO
3 INT. SECURITY CONTROL ROOM. NIGHT. **
We see OMAR and MATT are in front of the bank of TV
screens. Security men, staring at the boring footage,
looking bored. Omar is deep in thought - can’t believe how
boring this all is.
MATT
(after a long beat)
I ran 23k on the weekend. 6k
Saturday morning. Had a light
lunch.
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
4
(MORE)

OMAR CLOCKS SOFIA WHO THINKS THIS IS MORE LIKE IT
OMAR
imperialist culture, superficial
materialism ends at the
capitalist church of McDonald’s.
WAJ
Flippin idiots
Omar watching the video winces
OMAR
It’s as though you’ve just had a
big mac, completely oblivious to
the amount...
WAJ
Complete flippin idiots. You
could have gone Chicken Cottage,
proper halal, bargain bucket
6.99!
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
3
OMAR
What you talking about?
WAJ
Talking about Chicken Cottage...
OMAR CAN’T HIDE THIS NONSENSE FROM SOFIA - WHO IS LOOKING
LIKE SHE WANTS TO SUPPORT THE PROJECT BUT CAN’T FIND A
FOOTHOLD
OMAR (CONT’D)
Dah! There’s another one where he
doesn’t say that.
MAHMOOD
(OMAR’S 8 YEAR OLD SON)
Your bit’s good Dad.
OMAR IS CONFLICTED - FRUSTRATED - NODS DISCONSOLATELY AT
SCREEN. NOW THERE’S A VIDEO OF FESSAL WITH A BOX ON HIS
HEAD.

(beat) I’ll bigger it. I'll hold
it nearer the camera that'll
bigger it.
Waj proffers the feeble unit & his hand enlarges with the
lens.
4 LIONS SCRIPT at 31.10.09
2
WAJ
Ayup you unbelieving kuffar
bastards.
BARRY
No,no, this is stupid, this is
absolutely stupid....
2 INT. OMAR & SOPHIA’S HOUSE. DAY. **
PULL BACK TO REVEAL THAT OMAR AND SOPHIA ARE WATCHING THE
VIDEO ON THEIR TELLY - WITH THE VIDEO CAMERA PLUGGED IN.
OMAR IS GLANCING AT SOPHIA AS THEY WATCH, LOOKING A BIT
WORRIED - IS THIS OK? IT’S NOT OK ... HE’S EMBARRASSED.
OMAR
These are the outtakes - the
bloopers
SHE STROKES HIS HAIR AFFECTIONATELY AS HE ZOOMS THROUGH THE
TAPE.
SOPHIA
He looks good (indicating Omar on
sceren).
WE SEE OMAR ON SCREEN NOW - WAJ NEXT TO HIM. THE VID RUNS
FOR A WHILE - OMAR COHERENT - PASSIONATE.
OMAR
Today is a wake up call. Today is
an opportunity for you to look in
the mirror at your western...

Alright, Waj just relax your
face. Now focus on what you’re
going to say
BARRY
We’ve got to go before the
battery goes.
OMAR
One, two, three, action.
Video image.… WAJ. He is a proud mujahid - holding his gun.
An AK47. Half size. Plastic. Toy. He stares at the lens,
pumps himself a face, holds it, looks off...
WAJ
Ayup you unbelieving kuffar
bastards - I'm gonna turn ya
baked beanz! - what?
He has been put off by something Barry is doing.
BARRY
What’s with the gun?
WAJ
Hey it’s proper replica man.
BARRY
What for - action man?
WAJ
Replica AK47.
BARRY
It’s too small, man.
WAJ
It’s not too small brother.
That’s just me hands. Big hands,
brother. (looks to Omar)
OMAR
Shut up, Barry. Try it without
our kid and let’s go.
BARRY
It’s too small, believe me.

Video image. WAJ is 20, a British Pakistani, built like a
fridge. He wears camos, a black headscarf & behind him a
rug is pinned to the wall.
WAJ
Yeah?
BARRY
No, sit properly like you’re
gonna mean it - like you mean it.
No, Waj, don’t muck about cos the
battery’s gonna go. Sit...
WAJ
Who’s mucking about? but I’m not
mucking about.
BARRY
Well you can’t sit like that.
Above shot lasts about a second then we see Omar and Barry
are looking at this on the monitor screen of the camera.
Barry is filming.
OMAR
What’s wrong with how he’s
sitting Barry?
BARRY
Come and have a look, it’s wrong.
OMAR
There’s nothing wrong with it.
WAJ gets up to see what he looks like in the camera.
BARRY
Not you. No. Right what you
looking at?
WAJ
There’s nothing there.
BARRY
No there’s nothing there. Now, go
and sit down. You can’t see
yourself now can you.
WAJ
I thought you were recording it!
BARRY
Now sit, sit. Fessal go away.
WAJ
I’m ready, i’m ready.

-rep got beaten by an indian kid

-rep got beaten by a danish kid

-rep got beaten by an irish kid

- Rep, not very good at csgo, got beaten by a french kid...

-rep took the credit for destroying towers which i did