gpotato's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 5:30am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 7:15am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 6:29am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked 5 Oct, 2016 @ 2:51pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 5:50am

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Unlocked 9 Jul, 2016 @ 1:42am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 6:15am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 8:14am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 9:27am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 25 May, 2016 @ 11:51am

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 28 May, 2016 @ 12:39pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 28 May, 2016 @ 1:55pm

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 9 Jul, 2016 @ 2:01am

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

Unlocked 6 Feb, 2018 @ 7:41am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 26 Jul, 2016 @ 10:35am

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked 6 Feb, 2018 @ 6:32am

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 6 Oct, 2016 @ 12:45pm

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked 6 Oct, 2016 @ 12:36pm

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

Unlocked 6 Feb, 2018 @ 7:34am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 9:18am

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Unlocked 7 Oct, 2016 @ 7:47am

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 5:56am

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 28 May, 2016 @ 1:10pm

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 28 May, 2016 @ 12:37pm

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 2 Aug, 2016 @ 4:24am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 26 May, 2016 @ 10:30am

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 28 May, 2016 @ 1:56pm

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 6 Feb, 2018 @ 7:30am

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 26 May, 2016 @ 10:32am

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 9 Jul, 2016 @ 1:55am

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 5:41am

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 8:29am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 25 May, 2016 @ 11:48am

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 26 May, 2016 @ 11:31am

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 7:21am

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 6:17am

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 28 Aug, 2016 @ 7:44am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 5:22am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 7:40am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 6:09am

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 24 May, 2016 @ 6:25am

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 28 Aug, 2016 @ 8:56am

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Unlocked 8 Feb, 2018 @ 5:26am

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 26 May, 2016 @ 11:52am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked 26 May, 2016 @ 11:18am

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Unlocked 7 Oct, 2016 @ 7:38am

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.

Unlocked 5 Feb, 2018 @ 2:08pm

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!

Unlocked 16 Mar @ 9:28am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 9 Jul, 2016 @ 2:03am

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked 16 Jul, 2016 @ 6:44am

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked 26 Jul, 2016 @ 11:23am

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.

Unlocked 26 Jul, 2016 @ 11:50am

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 28 Aug, 2016 @ 8:16am

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

19 / 30

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

15 / 20

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

11 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

0 / 5,000

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

0 / 30