⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏ME
⠀⠀⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋
⠀⠀⠀⠀⣉⠉⠉⠉
⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦
⠀⣾⣿⠏⣥⣤⣍⢻⣿⣷
⢰⣿⣿⡈⣿⣿⣿⡄⢿⣿⡇
⣸⣿⣿⣷⡘⣿⣿⣿⣌⢻⠇
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡘⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⢻⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⢀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣄
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣙⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣬⣭⣉⡙⢿⣿ Emperor Gopal
⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⢉⡛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⡿
⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿D=)::⠻⣷⣶⣤⣬⣭⣍⣥⠞⠁
⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠛⠛⠋⣡⣴⣶⣦⣄⡀
⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆

Greetings, this is John from Condom o' plenty. We would just like to inform you about our Extra Small Size being on a 50% discount. We have noticed that you are one of our most valued customers and we know that your favorite product of ours is the Extra Small Size. Thank you!

-John

+rep cool Ace

⠀⠀⠚⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠘⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣀⠀
⠶⠿⢰⣿⣶⣦⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣦⡄⠀⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿
⠀⠀⠀⠻⠿⠃⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠉⣉⣉⣩⣥⡶⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣻⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⢠⣿⠃
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠁⣴⣿⣿⣿⠟⠃⡀⠀⢠⣿⠟⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣤⣄⠀⣤⣤⣤⢰⣿⡦⣿⠀⣿⣿⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⠛⠛⠀⠛⠛⠋⠈⠉⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢴⡆⣤⣤⣄⡄⢀⣀⣀⢀⣀⢀⡄⠀⢨⣿⣿⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠃⣿⣿⣿⠇⣿⣿⡋⣿⠏⠛⣃⣤⣾⣿⣿⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣤⣄⣠⣤⣠⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀

After a good game in CS:GO, I added him because he seemed like a cool guy. We got chatting, over the next couple of months we became good friends. Lots of banter, lots of great CS and most importantly true friendship.

I invited him to my house for a CS:GO Lan party. He said he was coming so I was looking forward to meeting him in real life.

When he arrived at my house, he pushed me against the wall and started nibbling my ear, I felt his hard ♥♥♥♥ push against my leg. I punched him and then 1 tapped him. Turns out he was gay. Don't trust this guy.

Happy bday sweetie