I bought this game for the chickens, and was not disappointed. After exploring the countless lands the chickens have traveled far and wide, I realized their population was growing too large. The chickens had started to inhabit such horrid locations across the world, such as nuclear plants, and offices without cafeterias. I knew what had to be done. I bought a flip knife off of the steam market, and called PETA. I listened to In the Arms of an Angel in my Microsoft Professional Deluxe Gaming Chair 360 for about twelve hours with no response, so, I decided to take matters into my own hands. I loaded up de_nuke and started to put the chickens out of their misery. I cried harder that night than I have ever before.

The next morning, with tears in my eyes, I loaded up Counter-Strike: Global Chicken, and I saw a new item waiting in my inventory. My Flip Knife had turned into a Flip Knife Slaughter. At that moment, I realized what a horrible thing I had done.
With my hand shaking, I navigated my mouse, and uninstalled Counter-Strike: Global Chicken.

I regret everything I have done. I am writing this review to warn you about the chickens, and to let you know I have made a full recovery, and that I have started my new journey in Goat Simulator. Thank you, and farewell.