Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house everyone felt ♥♥♥♥♥♥ even the mouse.
Mom at the whorehouse and dad smoking grass, I settled down for a nice piece of ass.
When all of a sudden I heard such a clatter, I sprung from my place to see what was the matter.
When out on the lawn I saw a big ♥♥♥♥, I new in a moment it must be Saint Nick.
He came down the chimney like a bat out of hell, I knew in a moment the ♥♥♥♥♥ had fell.
He filled all of our stockings with pretzels and beer and a big rubber ♥♥♥♥ for my brother the queer.
He rose up the chimney with a thunderous fart, the son of a btch tore the chimney apart.
He swore and he cursed as he flew out of sight, "piss on you all and have a hell of a night."