I have a confession...

I am extremely attracted to the Hog rider from the hit games Clash of Clans (also abbreviated as CoC 🥵.)🥵.)) and Clash Royale. Every morning I wake up with an extreme boner imagining the rider smashing my balls with his mighty gold-gilded hammer while I ride the hog from behind and scream out "HOG RIDEEEEEEEEEEEEER!!!"

Every time I think of him and see him, I imagine the hog he's riding is me. It truly does pain me every waking moment of everyday where I realize that I cannot be with the Hog rider. I am nothing without the hog rider 🥺😭😭🥺🥺