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The home of the bean and the cod,
Where the Lowells talk only to Cabots,
And the Cabots talk only to God.
😬
"You won't get away with this," said Cutwell. He thought for a bit and
added, "Well, you will probably get away with it, but you'll feel bad about
it on your deathbed and you'll wish -- "
He stopped talking.
-- Cutwell tries to reason with the Duke of Sto Helit
(Terry Pratchett, Mort)
🤒
Census Taker to Housewife:
Did you ever have the measles, and, if so, how many?
🤐
You shouldn't wallow in self-pity. But it's OK to put your feet in it
and swish them around a little.
-- Guindon
🤓
Bart: Oh, cheer up, Mom. You can't buy publicity like that. Thousands
and thousands of people saw your pretzels injuring Whitey Ford.
Homer: You can call them Whitey-whackers!
-- Homer Simpson
The Twisted World of Marge Simpson
😫