After my time serving with the squirrel overlords I decided to defect and take on the role of a mild mannered unassuming journalist called Clark Kent, with the secret alter ego of Spiderman! I studied at Proffesor Xavie's School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I wrote my disertation with Jedi master Gandalf in my time on the spaceship serenity.

Or I'm a person with truly bizarre real life CV.

Take your pick.