Recente recensies door Jartor

Schizophrenic Japanese StarDew valley JRPG

It's already this great and it's in Early Access, if you take your time with it, I think this is a real sleeper, I did not expect to like it.

No idea how I didn't review this sooner. If there was a top 5 all time list for all games, all genres, all everything, this would be perhaps #2 or #3 for me.

I want them to play the Kenshi Theme OST at my funeral.

It's alright, doesn't do much that separates it from the city-building genre and you still have to deal with all the asinine minutia of a world where people could literally not survive without you. Deals with Areas of Influence, still structured around building certain structures every so often (humanity has not yet invented the concept of walking down the street to get a sandwich in this era).

It all revolves around the tried and true needs of the settlers just like any other colony sim game, don't mind me, I'm just refusing to work while a giant dragon gorilla murders my entire family because milord didn't provide me with the exact right number of couches, by the way I go through four pairs of clothes and sixteen couches per day, this is peak human performance, without my couches I have to go on strike.

As per most of these games the simulated entitlement of these digital villagers makes me was to dip my coinpurse in boiling peanut oil, but it's not unique in that regard, like I said.

Combat is very basic RTS with the dumbest AI priority imaginable, trying to micro is insanity bait and there's no 'disposition' for troops (like aggressive mode), and they'll really just shoot at a wooden barn while barbarians are chopping them in half. Targeting an archer on the walls for example is an exercise in futility.

Some points are frustrating, the game is very buggy, AI needs a huge amount of effort to fix, your city pathing can break, builders no longer building after a point, stuff like that. Very early access, near title and concept though so I look forward to seeing what comes of it. It had a neat little empire building metagame and I very much like how the world map is THE world map and you can travel between points.

Game needs:
-AI aggro dispositions / automation, even if that's just letting them go crazy and prioritizing other hostile units rather than buildings
-Cat girls with really large boobies
-A way to sincerely automate colonies
-Clearer labeling of POIs (like other npc villages and barbarian camps) on the minimap, I'm trying to figure out where these other villages are to trade and I can't.
-Perhaps more streamlined resource needs, the minutia of managing these into the endgame is quite crazy, but like other games of this genre people like doing that sort of thing, I just don't. And by this I mean requiring a gorillion (real number fr) resource inputs for your later tiers of citizens. They require SO MANY items to stay happy.
-I'd also like to see areas of influence expanded a bit on the stockpiles / granaries, they are so small currently that it's insane. Every cluster of ten houses does not need it's own 7/11 my guy, these people have feet, they can walk

I liked it, it was fun, but I wish the devs that make these colony sims would come to some point of allowing people to be at least somewhat autonomous rather than relying on me to do everything for them just so I can make a single bottle of baby oil.

I don't typically like reviewing games negatively but perhaps I will save one of you from suffering. I've put a few hundred hours into this not including my time training in the Korean hyperbolic time chamber so I feel like I've done enough to justify an opinion.

Pros:

-You can pet cats and dogs in certain towns.

Cons:

-The PvE is okay but not nearly enough to engage anyone beyond a few hours of it, the dungeons are pretty sleepy, the problem being mostly that it relies on currency that only refreshes daily. OR, alternatively, it relies upon you going to lizard island and getting chests every night which only happens for the zerg guilds at the top. I have belonged to this zerg, nobody 'casual' is every touching these, and it's unfair, not because I haven't gotten them but because you probably won't if you're still wondering about playing. If it were up to me, and I was the emperor of the internet, I would give you these coins so you can do your dungeons little buddy.

-AGS (Amazon Game Studios) is Satan

-Skill expression is about the bottom of the barrel out of any mmo I've ever seen, this entire game is dominated by CC, which is really common in KRMMO's, except there is absolutely no CC immunity mechanic (it does not exist), copers will mention an item you can craft (it immunes 1 CC, does not give a cc immunity for 5s, etc.). After all these hours I still have not gotten that item via normal means btw, it's a p2w CC cleans trinket.

-Melee sucks, if you're a melee gamer you will probably not enjoy it, and when I say that I do not mean melee cannot kill people. Small scale / arenas it's actually pretty overpowered, but in the content that matters? It is miserable, only works as a tank, and only barely. It's a melee class with all of its real damage being tied to very long animations / CAST BARS (on melee btw) that do not allow you to move during said ability, which requires you to be entirely reliant on CC which is just another one of many problems.

-Every server is earned by a zerg willing to do anything to win, this game is all about the money. Conventionally you'd expect 'cheaters' ('''cheaters''') to be banned, they are not banned in this game. There's an auto-block client that exists that can be configured to block anything based on custom orders, it is packet injecting, it reads what an ability is and chooses what you block without you ever even needing to pay attention. It's more common than you'd think. They've not banned for it ever, even on KR. Instead of banning people who RMT'd (bought 'illegal' Lucent cash shop currency), they've not banned anyone but forced these people to pay money to THEIR store to recoup the balance, many find this creative / amusing but it's not. It's just greedy, and it solves few issues short term.

-This is an addendum to my previous point. I am not against RMT necessarily, I've spent money on this game so I want to express this so as not to be hypocritical. This game is p2w to an extent, any claims it is not p2w are pure and utter cope, perhaps 30% of your character's entire power is bound to traits which you can pay for without ever playing, that is p2w, people without traits? I one shot them.

-AGS / Amazon will ban for EVERYTHING except for cheating. Exploiting bosses on cooldown? That's fine. Using 'the client'? That's also fine, apparently. But if you use the name of a player in the game, which ends up being a slur, you'll be banned for 3 days. Just like New World except even worse they pass out chat / game bans like candy, they didn't ban people that spent hundreds on illegal lucent, but they'll ban you for calling someone 'stupid' or whatever else. Perhaps this is cope, but my second ban was for joking with a guild member about 'eating them' (GONE EROTIC), 7 days. That's their prerogative, it's their ToS after all, but observe all points and tell me that this is okay. It's weird.

-The game is pretty but it's soulless, you can see the asset rips in some of the terrain installations and especially around towns. At the edges you can see houses just floating on a cliff / with doors in the stone. They look pretty but are not custom designed whatsoever, little care is given to the less easily seen parts of the world making sense.

-Unless you belong to a zerg, you will be zerged, because every server is boiling down into a server of one alliance, 4 guilds with 70 members each. If you're familiar with other MMOs this promotes a system of 'all calling'. Take New World for existence, imagine a siege level event happening not once per day but at least 4 times, forcing you to 'trim the fat', so to speak, enforcing an attendance policy, and that is exhausting. Casual players, which I am not one of, are offered no place to swim in this environment.

-RNG is absurd, but that's the krmmo standard so it's not like it's new. However, if you got a lucky pull on the first few weeks you now have more lucent than you might ever need (400-500 dollars worth) thanks to the RMT. This could be seen as 'good for f2p players', but I don't think it is, because you are not the only people out there in the jungle and it all relies on an economy of that same currency.

-Bots are everywhere, they do ban bots but they're still extremely prevalent which makes very day-to-day genre activities difficult. Contracts occupy some of your dailies (basically kill quests) and some of these locations are still swarming with bots, it's not insurmountable but it IS annoying and immersion destroying.

-This game is dominated by very bizarre and obfuscated statting systems. In your typical MMO you wouldn't see the ability to build specifically for one sort of 'evasion' over any other, that's almost unheard of. but in this game you start minute and second one stacking evasion (or endurance - which is just flat out inferior because of the itemization OUTSIDE of being a tank), and you have that. So when someone says this is NOT p2w, they are wrong, because if I wanted to I could build a new character right now, with a few hours of mental, and pay for all my traits allowing me to be functionally untouchable to other people. You can do that with money. It is p2w, son.

-The PvP is boring and relies entirely too much on very long CCs that you'd only typically use when someone is CC'd, which as anyone might imagine is an entirely terrible way to develop a game.

TL;DR

This is a game that masquerades itself as more casual than it is, it is a grind every day, every hour, sort of game. If you do not do that and you are still being successful it might just be that you're carried by people doing it in your place. Everything is CC. Everything is AOE. We have not gotten a balance patch even after a month, there are bow and staff (or otherwise) players with 10,000 kills after one month, that is 333 kills per day and this isn't even counting assists which are also a factor. Solution? An incumbent nerf to tanks and melee, this is biased though so we can just ignore that. Your kill ranking allows you the ability to functionally lock out pve bosses and dungeons, so it's important that someone in your guild be the top fragger. It's a neat idea but it doesn't work in all reality because GM's use it to threaten smaller guilds into merging / submitting and the drama (in classical MMO fashion) is contant.

It's possible to have fun, especially as a small no-ego player just playing games to play games, but I have this many hours in it, and the only reason I'm playing still is because of loyalty and sunk-cost-fallacy type mental. Do something better with your time that makes you happy, the era of MMOs in general is over, but especially KRMMOs.

In proper conclusion:

This is Archeage 2 but lacking every single thing that made Archeage fun in the first place.

I also hate Halloween, and they have a Halloween event, which should have been enough for me

After spending ~3 hours stuck in a mission, a TUTORIAL mission by the way (the first fish mission) - I can't really see this going anywhere. PvP might be good, the game's premise is good but at this point I'm having trouble finding a mission I can actually complete.

You expect a certain level of RNG in any card game but at least for my initial (and obviously short exposure), I feel like that RNG is too much.

Note: I am not LOSING in these missions, I was INSIDE the mission for 3 hours because I could not pull enough of an army to beat the enemy base. I had built so many towers that I no longer had any room to build on, so I was stuck with my hand, 1 discard per turn, and that's it, there's nothing else. Infinite water mortars, no room for any econ, spent cycling as much as you can in an attempt to get new cards, it just doesn't work - and I'd even reckon that if you don't get extremely lucky and wipe the enemy within 3 turns it's just impossible to finish.

All predicated on getting the exact cards you want, the AI is not required to build and it cheats, the tutorials allow for no deck customization and seem rigged against you. Making 'tutorial' missions that tight if not flat out impossible seems like a poor decision in a game where after every single phase the enemy base repairs itself completely, everything you broke comes back. I killed over 1 million units, I was on turn 40+ before I finally realized that I was cutting it close for a refund.

Tutorials should not be so frustrating or tuned to such an extent that it feels 'hard', and it's not like I was on the final boss of the campaign or whatever, this is like the 4th mission. The problem stems from being forced to use your cards which terminates in your card pool getting diluted the more the game goes on, that seems to be a feature, but it's poorly balanced regardless.

I tried, I like the vision, maybe I'll come back to it if it seems like the concurrent pop is enough for a long term pvp scene to develop - even though I would have liked to stick with pure PvE. Also: Day 1 DLC, though people have already mentioned that.

I'm festering my gel

Crying and humping the floor... rubbing the floor... ugggghhhhh... *moans*... UGGGGHHHHH!!! *wet noises, slapping, like the sound of feet running through a meadow of deli sliced chicken breast*

I met Lilly at the age of 61, six months, 29 days. She had golden hair, like fresh wheat, her majesty was like something out of a dream, and her eyes were blue like sapphires. When I met her she was cold, she was professional, and she was--

SHE IS NOT REAL.

NO!!!! I LOVE HER!!! Reality sets in, I'm stroking my sht rn... fr rn... but reality will not let me nut. GUH! Let me pretend! Oh God... Let me pretend just a little longer! No, the voices say. No. Take a shower, this is not healthy, you've been at this for fourteen hours, you degenerate. NO!!!!! I WON'T LISTEN!

But the voices... they speak louder...

SHE IS NOT REAL.

I squeeze harder, stroke faster, there is fire in my loins, it hurts!!! And yet I cannot bust?!?!?!? Please!!! LET ME.... EEEEYUUUUHHHH!!! NOOOOO-O-O-O-O (like an echo noise) O-O-O-O (cuz im crying rn fr rn) O-O-O-O... WAAAAAH!!!! MOOMMMMYYY!!! MILKY!!!!! BLIND MOMY MILKY!!! UAWWWWAAUAUAUAUAUA (crying noises fr rn)... UAWAAAAAWAUAUAUAAUAUAU... (fr ong)...

LILLY!!! LILLY!!!!!!!!

GUHHHHHH!!! INEEDHER

I can't get off blind girl tinder... she is real... and I will find her...

Three anti-psychotics later:

It's a well written game made be a passionate developer, the setting is a bit curious but nothing overwhelming so, the art fidelity is respectable - rather quite high. Clearly made with passion, clearly free to play, I have respected this developer for what feels like a decade and continue to. Good job. Fr rn. I really am stroking rn tho. Ong rn.

You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the socialist...

You are my enemy

It's okay, it's by no means a bad game, but I feel the need to express the barebones state of the game. Again, it isn't bad, I'd even say it has potential to become one of the better city builders.

I've (almost) full cleared the game in less than 10 hours of playtime (some of it offline) - that's how little content there is. Being able to shape custom plots and stuff, the building system, all of it is awesome, but right now you are on an extremely small map and there aren't other settlements, just armies. Probably 95% of what I would expect the game to be is currently 'WIP', it doesn't exist yet. The scenarios are extremely bare, one objective, no real dynamic experience, everything is linear, the most complex part of the current game is deciding how you'll progress early game. Everything else comes to the same end and I can't see any variability (or replayability) in that.

Don't invest in this if you are expecting any sort of full game / playthrough - I'll express again that the game is good and playable - but there is no content, and it's not worth the launch price. I'll keep an eye on this long term, obviously, I really hope it does come to the point I want it to, and while I'm not necessarily disappointed, it's not worth $29.99 USD right now. And it might not be for another year, two, or even three.

I have high hopes, but I'm marking it as a negative review for now for visibility and a departure from what I believe a game like this to be worth.

As for the POSITIVES:

-Great building system to look forward to, removing a lot of the really annoying parts of city builders, your citizens actually handle most problems themselves via the market. Lack of micro is a breath of fresh air.

-Combat is (or will be) fairly dynamic, as troops rely on supplies for their quality (I think??) and you can progress them in a certain fashion.

-Families handle the market, meaning - for example - the 'wives' of your workers (everything is 'family' rather than 'settler', help sell their goods to provide for housing needs. Making this POTENTIALLY better than games like banished.

Greetings, I'll keep this short.

I am you from the future of 2041, and I come with a warning. Pocketpair did it, they actually did it, they managed to create the greatest gaming experience ever known or ever to be known. Palworld was the last video game. They managed to give me the sly smile of Broncherry and the seductive eyes of Lunaris, the wild hijinks of Lovander. We were all so happy back then, we had it all, but it didn't last forever...

Once we were on the cusp of true greatness, of transcendence, and we almost had it. We were so close, but the globalists simply couldn't allow our perfection to hit that terminal point of achievement. They took everything from me, they will take everything from you.

The world is grim and dark. The governments of the world have turned against us. They have made intercourse with Pals illegal. Yes... I told you it was dark, they have banned pals**xuality and brutally hunt pal-human hybrids in the street. Seventeen of my children have thus far perished in the fires of total war.

But I can always make more, more children, more children with my pals. We are those few fight the good fight. We are those few who would rather stand inside a Lunaris than live on their knees. I will never stop breeding my pals. I will never stop creating twisted mutant husks bereft of a human soul that mewl their half heard pleadings of release from the pain. One day I will get it right, and I will become God.

If you are reading this, Grand Chancellor Tingle Willingham, know that for all your attempts you will never find me, for I am the beast in the jungle of your very own mind. DON'T EVER STOP BREEDING YOUR PALS! DON'T LISTEN TO THE MEDIA, BIG GOVERNMENT WANTS US ALL TO ONLY HAVE HUMAN SPAWN. I WILL NEVER STOP HAVING SEX WITH PALS!!!

(It's well worth 29.99 - great dev track record - I am 茅ヶ崎のわんぱくチキン)