Our Gaben, who art in Bellevue, hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is on steam. Give us this day our daily sale and forgive us our empty wallets, as we forgive those who have empty wallets upon you. And lead us not unto consoles, and deliver us from Microsoft, and Sony for thy name is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever and ever and ever. Praise Gaben.

Hail Gaben, full of games, the Master Race is with thee; blessed art thou among gamers, and blessed is the fruit of thy Valve, Steam. Holy Gaben, Father of Steam, pray for our wallets, now and at the hour of our Steam sale.

Amen.