Yijel » Games » Genital Jousting Stats

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19 of 28 (68%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

Most Improved Tapulator

Learn how to literally just navigate the main menu.
Unlocked 21 Aug, 2018 @ 6:17am

Go Left

Move to the left.
Unlocked 22 Jun, 2018 @ 2:30am

Go Right

Move to the right.
Unlocked 22 Jun, 2018 @ 2:30am

Meet Your Maker

Penetrate God.
Unlocked 22 Jun, 2018 @ 3:04am

Fire Inspector

Safely deploy all the fire extinguishers. For safety.
Unlocked 22 Jun, 2018 @ 2:41am

Self Defence

Use the cake knife to defend yourself from wedding guests.
Unlocked 22 Jun, 2018 @ 3:18am

Swan Tamer

Make peace with a gaggle of swans. Their natural instinct is to kill.
Unlocked 22 Jun, 2018 @ 3:19am

Popcorn Buffet

Eat a disgusting amount of popcorn.
Unlocked 9 Jul, 2018 @ 11:12am

Appalling Appetite

You should see a doctor immediately.
Unlocked 9 Jul, 2018 @ 11:12am

Clumsy

Die a lot of times in your nightmares.
Unlocked 21 Aug, 2018 @ 6:33am

A Better John

Start taking responsibility for you actions.
Unlocked 29 Jun, 2018 @ 7:45am

Couch Party

Have enough friends and enough controllers to play an 8 player game.
Unlocked 26 Dec, 2019 @ 8:31am

Always Finishes First

Good at video games. Terrible at sex.
Unlocked 29 Jun, 2018 @ 8:02am

Generous Lover

Finish last in a Party Mode game.
Unlocked 29 Jun, 2018 @ 8:02am

The Perfect Partner

Marry yourself in Abstinence.
Unlocked 29 Jun, 2018 @ 7:59am

My Precious

Get all of the rings in Lord of the Rings.
Unlocked 15 Feb, 2019 @ 12:17pm

Till Death Do Us

Have sex in the Date Night graveyard.
Unlocked 1 Jul, 2018 @ 6:22am

Autopaedicatio

Penetrate yourself in Traditional Mode.
Unlocked 29 Jun, 2018 @ 8:08am

Fussy Lover

Save yourself for that special orgy.
Unlocked 1 Jul, 2018 @ 11:34am



Early Bird

Swallow every worm.

Sleep No More

Don't let sleeping dongs lie.

Bulking Gear

Use all the "supplements" you can for maximal gains.

Paperwork

Submit your monthly physical report.

Master Unlocker

Collect enough milk to fill the tank.

Spare Wheel

Be the only one locked out of an ouroborus.

Magnetic Basshole

Win Lights Out in under five seconds.

Safety First

Everyone survives having sex in a trash-compactor full of needles.
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