I sexually Identify as an Octane. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the pitch dropping hot sticky aerial goals on disgusting orange team. People say to me that a person being a octane is impossible and I'm ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install boosters, 30 mm cristianos and alpha boost on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "SquishyMuffinz" and respect my right to ceiling shot from above and hit boomers needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a rocket-phobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.

Sir you have been found with Rocket League hacks. A SWAT team is on the way to your location. Make sure the door is open, otherwise they are ready to break it down. Don't destroy any evidence and don't contact your accomplices! Prepare disks, flash drives and any other multimedia devices containing illegal materials, proving your criminality. Be prepared to answer the questions during your interrogation! Cooperate and don't deny the charges against you.