MY NAME IS MUD; NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH BILL; OR JACK OR PETE OR DENNIS; MY NAME IS MUD AND ITS ALWAYS BEEN; 'CAUSE I'M THE MOST BORING SONS-A-♥♥♥♥♥ YOU'VE EVER SEEN; I DRESS IN BLUE-YES NAVY BLUE; FROM HEAD TO TOE IM RATHER DRAB EXCEPT FOR MY PATENT SHOES; I MAKE 'EM SHINE, WELL MOST THE TIME; 'CEPT TODAY MY FEET ARE TRODDIN' ON BY THIS FRIEND OF MINE; SIX FOOT TWO AND RUDE AS HELL; I GOT TO GET HIM IN THE GROUND BEFORE HE STARTS TO SMELL; MY NAME IS MUD; MY NAME IS MUD, BUT CALL ME ALOWISHUS DEVADANDER ABERCROMBIE; THATS LONG FOR MUD SO IVE BEEN TOLD; TOLD BY THIS SONSABITCH THAT LIES BEFORE ME BLOATED BLUE AND COLD; I'VE GOT MY PRIDE, I DRINK MY WINE; I'D DRINK THE FINEST EXCEPT I HAVENT EARNED A DIME IN SEVERAL MONTHS; OR WERE IT YEARS; THE BREATH ON THAT FAT BASTARD COULD BRING ANY MAN TO TEARS; WE HAD OUR WORDS, A COMMON SPAT; SO I KISSED HIM UPSIDE THE CRANIUM WITH AN ALUMINUM BASEBALL BAT; MY NAME IS MUD