oh no this isnt google\

weed

only a nerd would marry alex

Where the fat ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ at?

rest in peas

Another White Guy 31 minutes ago
I was sitting at my computer one night enjoying some German Dungeon Porn. When my mother walks in: there was silence, nothing moved. After what seemed like eternity she approached me and said go upstairs or you will be late for the anniversary for the first time you masturbated. I nodded and went upstairs in the middle of my living room stood a large cake covered in rainbow sprinkles and pink frosting. Breathlesly I approached donning my masturbation bib. However as I got within three feet of the cake It burst apart in a shower of Rainbows and dirty prostitutes. From the epicenter of the explosion arose a naked Morgan Freeman. He turned slowly to me and said "come here boy take my hand." I swallowed and grabbed his hand, and he transformed into a glorious black panther. He told me to hang on and he would show me the universe. It was the greatest anninversary of my first masturbation ever.