Why must steam be so broken with machine-synced achievements?

Wellcum!

↓↓↓ Abandon all hope, ye who scroll here ↓↓↓

Yes I'm online. Does that mean I'll respond? lol no
I'm that guy who buys multiplayer games to play solo.
Friend requests? Messages? I'll see them in 3-5 business months.

If I'm not online that means:
- I Fell asleep mid-game like an NPC.
- My PC caught fire (again).
- I Got Stuck in a 3-hour Wikipedia rabbit hole about medieval torture devices.
- The simulation glitched and I noclipped into the backrooms.
- I got distracted watching some guy restore a 500-year-old spoon on YouTube.
- Got baited by a gacha banner (those catgirls don't pull themselves).

I play VRChat, BeamNG, and Assetto Corsa because I have superior taste.

If you wanna play CS2, Valorant, or anything PvP with me. Stop right there.
I hate PvP. Hate it more than NTR.
I have the aim of a blindfolded grandma with arthritis.
Reaction time of a Pentium 4 running Vista.
Game sense of a tutorial NPC that walks into walls.

Busy with work most days (yes, I touch grass, but only because rent exists).

I make VRChat models, MMO assets, and suffer in Blender, Unity, and Photoshop.
If you hear distant screaming "WHY WON'T THIS EXPORT" that's me having a normal Tuesday.
I code in Python and Node.js, sometimes C# when I crave suffering.

Huge tech nerd. Self-taught everything from hardware to native English compared to some people I heard from my country I don't sound like a revving civic when I say R.
Ask me anything about electronics and I'll infodump for 3 hours straight.

Yes, I am a weeb. Down bad fr.
Tried leaving. Came crawling back.
Now I just gaslight myself that my figure collection is "home decor."
I play gacha games because I hate having money and those limited SSR waifus won't collect themselves.
My wallet is on life support but the dopamine hits different.

Your profile is worse than mine, don't even try.
10k hours in Farming Simulator, HuniePop, and Garfield Kart?
Or worse... Gmod DarkRP?
Yeah.

My games are private because Steam doesn't need to snitch on me for:
- Reinstalling Skyrim for the 69th time.
- Downloading another hentai game “for the story.”
- Having 900+ hours in a game I "only tried once"
- My Nekopara playtime

When it comes to being absolute garbage at everything, I remain undefeated.
Speedrunning life on hard mode with no tutorial. ^.^

https://imgur.com/a/akJIR

Why is this bio so long?
Mostly because I can't shut up and this is the closest thing I have to a personality.
Also my therapist costs money and free text spaces are free.

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