If you think this just doesn't look like your cup of tea and you won't like it, you're wrong. Maybe it's too shallow a cup of tea. Maybe it's too weak. No, my friend. This is not just any tea. This is a bottomless pit of chai, picked from bright tropical rainbow fields. The steering is exquisite; imagine delicately picking tea leaves with a humvee's grill, with your tire treads spawning a billion new seedlings yet crushing none. Imagine the humvee runs on raw spices, its smoke an aromatic blend of cinammon, cardamon, nutmeg and cloves. Imagine the humvee is filled with an oxygenated mass of ginger and lemon that you can float and breathe in, and now you are flipping the tea leaves by flipping your fat humvee 720 degrees; you are weightless and not remotely ill. Now you hop, you leap, and you are flying through the air. You're in a rocketship humvee and you're not as free as a bird, but those tea leaves; they are yours. And sometimes not; there are others floating about making tea, and sometimes they steal a sip of yours and vice versa, but you don't mind at all; in no small part because none of you are remotely milk intolerant and the clouds are branded A2 proteins. The heavens are raining warm honey milk down upon you, your humvee is burping steam through the leaves and you are on a planet of foaming chai latte.

That is Rocket League.