Once upon a cs major, while I cancelled my placed wager
I saw the cobble box I got the round before.
While I cheered, maybe quite weird, yet opening feared,
directly steered to check the price in store.
It's pricy but I know what's more,
the oh so famous dragon lore.

Oh what is in that fancy case besides that gorgeous awp replace
good skins or a disgrace, I asked myself just like before.
They are quite neat, but not elite
feel incomplete, while looking at my inventor'(y)
Hoping to get lucky just like others were before
and get the famous dragon lore.

I opened it and heard the sound, the guns were spinning round and round
felt my heart's pow'ful pound, sweat dripped off every pore.
Suddenly a crazy voice, an aweful screaming, screechy noise,
the wage for my so stupid choice, so bad and yet so hoar.
Have I been chosen, do I now own a sweet dragon lore?
Quoth the Gaben: Nevermore!

So I went competitive what happened was repetitive,
my best I always tried to give, was killed through every door.
I heard of cs anti-cheat, detecting all the cheats so sweet,
kicking them hacks in a heartbeat but nothing changed the score.
I asked when VAC will be upgraded in it's very core.
Quoth the Gaben: Nevermore!

I finally found a way to fight, my future looking good and bright,
won every game in sight, spent most my time indoor.
Although I won like every game, the rank just stayed, it stayed the same
no uprank came oh what a shame, my wrists already sore.
So I wrote Valve and asked when I'll be Nova Four.
Quoth the Gaben: Nevermore!

And the Gaben never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting
on his desk behind a golden door.
And his eyes have all the seeming of a demon's that is dreaming,
taking joy of players screaming, when cases they explore.
And the game on my harddrive, I willingly ignore
shall be started Nevermore!