Recent reviews by Kalivos

I strongly advise against purchasing this game as they have jacked the price up from $5 to $20, and the true icing on the cake is that none of the money goes to Mladen Bošnjak, the game's creator, and instead it will all go to a thieving ♥♥♥♥. I had originally left a positive review around the time of the game's release, but have decided to remove that entirely.

This game is essentially the love child of the Rocksteady Arkham games and Ubisoft's Assassin's Creed franchise, and it is pretty wonderful. The story is fairly average and they pull a lot of LOTR lore out of their rear ends, but in the end made a very enjoyable game to play through over and over again.

You are Talion, a man with the brains and physical prowess of Bruce Wayne and the parkour skills of Jason Bourne. You have some of the flashiest sword play abilities known to middle earth and also have a ghost-bro that aids you in tricking enemies towards bushes and cliff edges. You're on a quest for revenge and you do it the only way you know how: Viciously murdering every orc you see, even if they've done nothing wrong with some of the most fun (yet incredibly simplistic) combat in video gaming today.

You can kill orcs in a variety of ways:
Grab them from behind and prison shank them to death
Shove them into a fire
Shoot them in the buttocks with arrows
Death from above
Generic swordplay murder
Gruesome finishing move executions
Slitting their throats like pigs after they've fallen to the ground
And so many other fun and enjoyable tactics that are fun for the whole family!!

The game also features an upgrade system for your abilities via Runes, as well as many abilities unlocked through the course of the story and bought through the course of the game with points acquired from murdering things.

Really though this game is all about orc murder. Forget the story, forget deep intricate characters...Just murder things and go for 100%. The game isn't the hardest, and there is no difficulty option, but if the game is too easy - just stop purchasing upgrades, the game gets increasingly difficult without them.

I acquired this game through a bundle with 4 other games for around $7.50. Had I paid $7.50 purely for this title I would have been not only disappointed but possibly angry enough to shove a pregnant lady down a flight of stairs. The game took around three hours for me to complete, and that is taking my time and enjoying the environments, which were just about the only things in this game I enjoyed. The control system is wonky, the story was very predictable and really held no surprises, and by the end I felt as if I had wasted my time. Please don't waste yours.