The Harbinger Experiment's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 21 Jun, 2014 @ 11:45am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 23 Jun, 2014 @ 4:30pm

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 22 Jun, 2014 @ 3:45pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 21 Jun, 2014 @ 11:54am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 22 Jun, 2014 @ 3:38pm

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 26 Jun, 2014 @ 5:00pm

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 29 Jun, 2014 @ 7:50pm

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 9 Jul, 2014 @ 8:50am

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2014 @ 9:30am

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2014 @ 8:14pm

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 4 Aug, 2014 @ 11:28am

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

Unlocked 12 Oct, 2020 @ 12:14am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 22 Jun, 2014 @ 3:26pm

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2014 @ 10:32pm

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 9 Jul, 2014 @ 7:29am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 26 Jun, 2014 @ 7:31pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 22 Jun, 2014 @ 9:40am

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 28 May, 2017 @ 8:52am

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 30 Jun, 2014 @ 5:20pm

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 22 Jun, 2014 @ 3:52pm

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 22 Jun, 2014 @ 11:21am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 26 Jun, 2014 @ 8:34pm

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 8 Jul, 2014 @ 5:54pm

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 9 Jul, 2014 @ 8:39am

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 3 Aug, 2014 @ 2:33pm

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 22 Jun, 2014 @ 9:48am

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 1 Jul, 2014 @ 8:40am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 8 Jul, 2014 @ 6:11pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 21 Jun, 2014 @ 11:48am

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Unlocked 21 May, 2017 @ 6:24pm

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2014 @ 7:33pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 23 Jun, 2014 @ 3:35pm

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 7 May, 2017 @ 6:00pm

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 8 May, 2017 @ 6:11pm

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 21 Jun, 2014 @ 11:44am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 21 Jun, 2014 @ 11:47am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 26 Jun, 2014 @ 5:36pm

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 22 Jun, 2014 @ 3:47pm

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 9 Jul, 2014 @ 8:50am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked 26 Jun, 2014 @ 7:32pm

John Rambo'd!

Made a very long killing spree.

Unlocked 25 Feb, 2018 @ 12:50pm

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!

Unlocked 23 Jun, 2014 @ 3:43pm

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 4 Aug, 2014 @ 11:30am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

15 / 30

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

2 / 10

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 20

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

0 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

0 / 5,000

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

0 / 30