NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE

Behold this, behold this folly! A traveling incantation market, arriving in twelve fortnights and fifty times, this quilled note doth arrive in mine carrier pigeon's nest each sunrise. Of its own accord, the 'traveling incantation market' doth return to mine carrier pigeon's nest each time the sun doth rise, and each day I return the letter because it was not set to burn after sundown. I NEVER desire to attend the traveling incantation market, for I am a knight. THESE SOULESS, MAIDENLESS—

I HATE THEM. I HATE THESE FOLLY-MONGERS! THESE WRETCHED MAGES! LOOK UPON THIS DAILY INCOMMODITY—THIS LETTER DELIVERED—AND KNOW WHAT HAPPENS AFTER RETURNING IT A FEW TIMES. WHEN DAYS PASS AND I KEEP RETURNING IT, FOR I DESIRE NOT TO ATTEND THIS FOOLISH MARKET THAT DOTH BREACH MY KNIGHTLY VOW OF HONOR AND MAKES ME CAST ASIDE MY HONOR.

THUS, RETURNING THE LETTER DAILY, THE MAGES SEEM TO INFLICT UPON ME, WITH WAND IN HAND, THE CHOICE OF BECOMING A MAGE EITHER BY WAITING FOR THE MARKET TO ARRIVE OR BY EMBRACING THE ROLE AT ONCE. THEY OFFER NO OPTION TO REFUSE BUT TRANSPORT ME INTO THEIR DUNGEON AT THEIR WHIM, SAYING 'THOU SHALT BECOME A MAGE, KNIGHT OR NO.'

LOOK UPON THIS INSULT! I AM A KNIGHT, A DIGNIFIED SERVANT OF THE KING. WHY MUST I BE TURNED INTO A MAGE? WHAT SPELLS, MORE SPELLS, TO MAKE ME A MAGE TO DON A ROBE AND HAT, WITH SPELL WAND AND GRIMOIRE? CURSE THEE, WIZARD COUNCIL! YE HAVE MADE ME A MAGEST!

meow

hi

Ah noo cheeki breeki i v damké!