I used to masturbate onto birds at a local park. Not a thing that I'm particularly proud of but I became quite good at it. I was taking zinc supplements so I was shooting massive loads and it became something of a sport to me.

For anyone interested here is your best strategy. First, you need to find an isolated spot so you don't become a sex offender. I found a short kind of channel area where I saw the pigeons would congregate. Next, you arouse yourself. I was usually content with envisioning the occasional jogging lady coming over and taking a ♥♥♥♥ on my chest and that was enough to fuel the fire but if you're not as sexually charged as me just take some porn on the go. After you're good an horny, you get some bread.

My pigeons preferred white bread but healthier birds might have a taste for honey wheat or maybe even multigrain. Fat, unhealthy birds are slower and easier to hit so remember that.

Once you are seated on the bench and ready to do the deed, whip your roosevelt out and scatter bread out within a few feet of you. use your judgement based on how far you know you can ♥♥♥. I was a lonely and depraved soul who could hit targets the size of a thimble at distances up to 4 feet. You wait for the pigeons to begin eating and to get comfortable with your presence. At this point, you want to coo gently and talk sensually to them to gain their trust.

Now you're finally ready to ♥♥♥ on your bird. This is a tough part because the rapid motion of masturbation is very frightening to the birds, so you have to be subtle. Once you master a technique, you simply wind it up and let it go, aiming depending on your past ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ experiences. I always came high so I would aim for the neck of the bird and catch it right in the face. It's an extremely satisfying and erotic feeling, seeing those birds reel around covered in ♥♥♥ and maybe even transporting it to other places in the city.

Either way I haven't done it in years but every now and then I catch myself gazing wistfully at a flock of birds, ♥♥♥♥ throbbing and waiting for them to land close to me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ieCjpmliSg

I've starred in 8 films, 2 gay, 6 straight, and directed over 30 now. It's a decent part-time living. Some of the actors and actresses are out there or druggies but some are decent folk too.

Btw, nearly every male porn actor, even the great Peter North, has to get their start in gay porn. It's like college football so the scouts can watch and see who can play in the pros. Lots of guys want to star in the big scenes with the hot chicks but you got to pay your dues in the gay side first and work your way up that ladder.

I mean who wouldn't drill a couple college kids in the keister for 20 minutes to be able to film scenes with chicks like Stoya (she's nuts) for the next 10 years or so? I would...and did.

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