Since the dawn of time, people have wondered what makes an onion ring so delicious. To answer this, we must take apart each individual item in this tasty snack. It contains an onion that must be fried, salt, sugar, and a special ingredient so rare, it may only be found by the wisest of people. You must travel past our solar system, to a planet known as "Le Crabe Croustillant," which is French for "The Krusty Krab." Once you have found this, you must speak to a celestial being known as, "Mr. Krabs." He, will take you in as his apprentice, and show you the ways of the onion. Once you are done with years of training, you and him will stand on top of his fast food restuarant, watching the sunset. He will then turn to you and whisper in a voice cracked from old age "You my son, are ready." He then should give you a box. Inside that box is an ingrediant so special, only your eyes should see it. You should travel back to Earth, and make as many batches of onion rings as you would like. To dispose of them, you must travel to the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, and dump it there. You must make sure you are not seen. After this, you will be granted full immortality, and will be next in line to take over The Krusty Krab. (Hopefully this guide has given you a better appreciation for fast food worker and what they have to go through. Keep fighting for that $15 an hour.)