Recent reviews by Blasuuム

It all started innocently enough. “Oh, I’ll just play FC25 for an hour. What’s the harm in that, right?” I said to myself, blissfully unaware that I was already signing the death warrant for my marriage. Oh God, those were beautiful times—before I lost everything!


FC25 is just a masterpiece! Gameplay so smooth, even Messi would be jealous. Goal after goal, dream team assembled, and I felt like the king of life. Everything around me ceased to exist—work? Who needs it! Wife? Still there! (At least, at the time.)

The anxiety kicks in. How is it possible that my team with Ronaldo, Mbappe, and Lewandowski keeps losing to some kid from Somalia with a squad made of last year’s leftovers? I blame the algorithms. It’s just not possible that, after two weeks of playing, I’m still stuck in the Bronze League. I start scratching myself in weird places, my wife asks what’s wrong with me. And me? I’m losing my mind because I can’t score from a corner kick.

Wife starts to worry. “Honey, is it normal that you’ve been sitting at the console all day, haven’t showered in a week, and you’re singing the Champions League anthem while shaving?” she asks. With my eyes glued to the screen, I mutter: “This is my virtual season, babe! The fate of world football is at stake here!” She walks out of the room, and I score an own goal. Coincidence? I think not.

We stop talking. The last time we exchanged words was when she accidentally sat on my controller. She was trying to help because I was in the middle of a complicated play. So, what did she do? Of course, she hit pause. And you can’t pause an online match! Boom! Game lost, promotion down the drain. That was the moment I realized FIFA had become more important than anything else in my life.

It’s over. With my wife, obviously. She gave me an ultimatum—her or FIFA. It was the most nerve-wracking decision of my life, but in the end, I did what any true football fan would do: I bought a new controller. On her way out, she said, “Enjoy your FC25!” And I replied, “Oh, I will!” And that was the end. For her, at least. I’m still grinding my way to Division 1.

FC25 is a world-class game! I’ve lost my wife, my sanity, and my connection to reality, but who cares—I’ve played the best virtual football of my life. If you dream of destroying your personal life and replacing it with an emotional rollercoaster, FC25 is the game for you. But be warned, when you’re left alone on the couch with an empty pizza box and virtual trophies, you might realize… there’s no real life left.

But that promotion to Division 1—PRICELESS.

s

n1

good enough

a lot of bugs, no textures xD